Because sports should never run your life ... retorts for sports

Australian Open Update: 1/15/19 (Men’s Singles) (and click post to hear a real genius)

Benoit “Blond Ambition” Paire
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Australian Open Update:

— Attention deficit poster boy Paire can’t overcome a 2-set deficit to Dominic
— No Greek tragedy as Tsitsipas hits all the right passes against Troicki
— After four too-close-for-comfort sets, short Schwartzman decides to stop cuddling with Kudla
— Jo-Wilfried finally finds a way to slow up Martin
— M. Zverev just didn’t have the pop in his groundies to stop Popyrin
— A wounded Ernests has to give it a rest against Wawrinka

— Sakharov found himself dominated right from the starterer against Marterer
— It wasn’t Friday the 13th, so no reason for Djoker to be scared by Krueger
— Loss to Milos will almost certainly make Nick sick
— Nice work by No. 19 Nikoloz
— Andreas sails by Jordan in 3 easy pieces
— Haase says no mas after being totally controlled by Tomas
— Another tennis clinic put on by Cilic
— Tiafoe, tennis’ version of little LeBron, proves to be a giant killer by KO’ing KA.
— Verdict for Verdasco, who leaves little doubt with a rout of Albot.
— For an extended period, unheralded Evans was ever so competitive with Fed.

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