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Category Archives: Olympic Games — PyeongChang (2018)

2018 Winter Olympics Update: 2-22-18 (Everybody PyeongChang Tonight!)

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2018 Winter Olympics Update:

  • US knocks Canada from the penthouse into the outhouse, and now is incredibly on the verge of a gold medal in curling. Who would have thought it would feel so good to stand in Shuster’s shoes.
  • No empathy for Noh as she fails to successfully pursue her comrades in team pursuit, and public outrage for the fan base.

2018 Winter Olympics Update: 2-21-18 (Everybody PyeongChang Tonight!)

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2018 Winter Olympics Update:
  • Hockey shocker as US Women sap the energy out of the Canucks in OT and grab the gold.
  • Sweet finish for Swedish Andre, who shakes off giant Ramon, and is left all alone in first in the slalom.
  • Wise guy proves one really smokin run through the halfpipe is all you ever need.
  • US Men visit great punishment on the brittle Brits with a 10-4 blowout in curling, and say hello to the medal round.

2018 Winter Olympics Update: 2-20-18 (Everybody PyeongChang Tonight!)

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2018 Winter Olympics Update:

  • Mon dieu, Mathieu… how could you?
  • Canadian women had been get back into the gym and work on their curls, because the rest of the world has clearly caught up; Brits hammer them in the decisive end and crush their medal hopes.
  • 33 year old Vonn puts her game face on and takes podium spot No.3 in the downhill.
  • US tried in vain to hang around for medal round festivities, but ultimately was told to Czech out; Americans Petr out in the shootout.

2018 Winter Olympics Update: 2-19-18 (Everybody PyeongChang Tonight!)

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2018 Winter Olympics Update::

  • Leave it to the Germans, to build a bobsled that wins, even when it turns over….
  • The much maligned US hockey team picks up its hindquarters and shimmies into the quarters.
  • IOC tells the dopes from OAR to take a permanent bathroom break at Penis Park.
  • US women make chop suey outta curling girls from China.
  • Are US Men a shoe-in now that Schuster’s locked in?

2018 Winter Olympics Update: 2-16-18 (Everybody PyeongChang Tonight!)

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2018 Winter Olympics Update:

  • Get out your pooh-per scoopers … lots of ’em being showered on the ice as Yuzuru remains the guru of Men’s skating
  • Dutch continue to have the magic touch when it come to speed skating, running circles around their competition like a clockwork orange… with today’s feat accomplished by pint sized Esmee Visser
  • Things get pretty chippy when Canadian skip chooses to burn the poisoned rock pushed by the delinquent Danes; problems was, what goes around comes around, including a comeback in the final end Homan’s homely dud of a shot to end things in OT
  • US Women tip over the OAR row boat in the 11th end… beat Russia in curling!

 

2018 Winter Olympics Update: 2-15-18 (Everybody PyeongChang Tonight!)

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2018 Winter Olympics Update: 2-15-18:

  • When it comes to men’s figure skating shorts, the overriding interest was clearly Yuzurious; Hanyu’s excellence leaves the rest of the field plenty short-handed, while Nathan Chen falls again, and again, and again … enough already!
  • Korean skeleton wins in the Skeleton.
  • Vincent Zhou promoted to the Quad Squad, after he shows unparalleled lust for the fabled quadruple lutz.
  • Austrian finally finds a way to take the top G-spot away from Norway.
  • Please sign ChabDog’s petition to keep Johnny Weird from doing color for March Madness.
  • Russia performance continues to sag due to embarrassment over the droopy OAR moniker.
  • US gets on track in hockey … socking it to Slovakia.
  • There’s something oddly familiar about host Liam McHugh … he’s the male version of tennis’ Chris Mckendry….way too comfortable on camera for words.

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