Because sports should never run your life ... retorts for sports

Category Archives: Olympic Games Rio (2016)

Summer Olympic Games (2016), Day 14

8-21-16 china 8-21-16 marathon 8-21-16 mongo (a karas) 8-21-16 mongo 8-21-16 shields 8-21-16 snyder 8-21-16 us men b-ball

Summer Olympics Update:

  • When’s the last time we saw anyone get this worked up over losing a bronze? A very mad Mandakhnaran gets penalized for his premature victory gesticulations, and upon losing the match, his coaches do the full Mongolian Monty in protest … creating angry Mongos of the sort we haven’t seen since Alex (“Mongo like candy”) Karras in “Blazing Saddles”.
  • USA makes Jamaica pay in the 4 x 400.
  • Durant and the rest of the Americans beat the pants off Serbia.
  • No surprise in the Marathon, as Kenya cleans up … winning gold with the elusive Eliud Kipchoge. Give Rupp from the US some serious credit for claiming bronze in only his 2nd race ever.
  • When it comes to Olympic Boxing, Clarissa can’t miss, and her shield was impenetrable.
  • Kyle “Mr. Freestyle” keeps the US’ hold on the gold in wrestling’s 97 weight class very secure.
  • Bitter Serbs also must endure a finals loss in Women’s B-ball, when China comes from halfway around the world to serve up the win.

Summer Olympic Games (2016), Day 13

8-20-16 brazil

8-20-16 korea

8-20-16 russian handball

Summer Olympics Update:

  • Korea Parks itself on the gold medal podium position in Women’s Golf.
  • In Women’s Handball, Russia hands France its biggest defeat since the days of Napoleon.
  • According to Coach K, everything in Rio is A Ok.
  • Point of clarification — Conger says he didn’t conjure up anything…. lol
  • Can you believe it? Another big soccer game comes down to penalty kicks. Simply too much action for this spectator….
  • A bunch of 3rd place games … oh boy!

Summer Olympic Games (2016), Day 12

8-19-16 bolt 8-19-16 us women pole valut 8-19-16 us women4 by 100

Summer Olympic Games Update:

  • In apparently the last race of an incredible career, Bolt proves once again that there’s nothing to gain by lining up to run against Usain. Jamaican juggernaut strikes gold for the 9th time in 3 Olympic Games, and makes his case for being the most dominant track star of all time.
  • US men experience the DQ treatment first hand in 4 X 100 M relay, coming down with a massive brain freeze at baton hand-off time.
  • US women prove to be too tough in an electrifying 4 x 100 M final.
  • Women’s Pole Vault goes to Greece, as US competitor can’t quite slide over the bar at 16+ feet.

Summer Olympic Games (2016), Day 11

8-18-16 bolt 8-18-16 crouser 8-18-16 lochte 2 8-18-16 lochte

Summer Olympics Update:

  • Bolt still runs like a young colt, and makes the rest of the field look like dolts in the 200 m.
  • Hungry Helen Maroulis wins America’s first ever gold medal for a woman, sinking Japanese legend Saori Yoshida.
  • Crouser puts it to the competition quite forcefully in the shot put — winning another gold for the US –, and as icing on the cake, Kovacs chips in for the silver.
  • Adam Eaton accomplishes another amazing back-to-back decathlon gold for the US, eating up points at an Olympic record pace.
  • Lots of unanswered questions surround the report card given by Lochte and friends to the Brazilian police … bottom line is it looks like the fun and games are definitely over…

Summer Olympic Games (2016), Day 8

8-14-16 bolt 8-14-16 murray 8-14-16 sumgong

Summer Olympic Games Update:

  • Murray’s fortress was simply too well fortified for a game Del Potro
  • Marathon woman Sumgong had no problem keeping going, despite the appearance of an annoying interloper.
  • After the disturbing robbery of Lochte and his three compatriots, Australia puts its team on beach lock-down and says “Goodnight Mate” to evening revelry.
  • Gatlin timed the starting gun perfectly, but he’s no match for Bolt, who is again lightning in a bottle.

Summer Olympic Games (2016), Day 5

8-10-16 china

8-10-16 japan gym

8-10-16 water polo

Summer Olympic Games Update:

  • Nice job by America’s Nico,… clinching at least a bronze, and the first male boxer to get a medal since 2008.
  • The water polo grounds are greener than the grass at the old Polo Grounds, and neither the crowd, nor the players can open their eyes. Awful.
  • China does some heavy lifting, and Japan’s Men dominate the gymnasium, but the US maintains a strong grip on the medals lead (32 to 23).

Summer Olympic Games (2016), Day 3

8-8-16 100m breast

8-8-16 field hockey

8-8-16 phelps


Summer Olympic Games Update:

  • US Men left off the medal podium for team gymnastics yet again, as Leyva leaves it all … on the floor after missing the bar.
  • Americans win field hockey contest when Briggs comes up big in goal.
  • Novak hits into the net one too many times, and hits the road leading out of Rio.
  • Would everybody just relax…. this is just a form of Chinese cupping that relieves shoulder pain and allows Phelps to apply water torture to his victims in the pool.
  • No backing down for the US in the 100 M back. Ryan Murphy makes sure of that.
  • Time to crown USA’s King as Queen of the Rio 100-meter breaststroke.
  • USA stretches its total medal lead in battling foes from the Far East and dopes from Russia.


Summer Olympic Games (2016), Day 2

8-7-16 australia 8-7-16 delpo 8-7-16 fencing 8-7-16 judo girl 8-7-16 long lifter 8-7-16 medal count 8-7-16 phelps 8-7-16 williams

Summer Olympic Games Update:

  • Phelps can’t dodge more gold;
  • In a shocking development, the Williams sisters get run over by the Czech duo of Safarova and Strycova.
  • Juan del Petro was all gassed up for his South American Olympics appearance, and it showed in the blistering forehands he was cranking out; Novak made it close, but his tank didn’t look completely full.
  • Long day at the office for Long’s opponents in weightlifting.  Incredible record set today in the Cling and Jerk.
  • Brazil continues to shoot a lot in soccer, but for no apparent reason or purpose.  Two 0-0 draws, thus far. Today, they dominated Iraq in time of possession, but were not ready at the moment of truth, including one botched breakaway featuring an open net.
  • Kosovo wins medal #1 … a gold in judo.
  • US jumps out to the total medal lead with a dozen, but is being doggedly pursued by China and Australia.

Summer Olympic Games (2016), Day 1

8-6-16 belg

8-6-16 oly1 8-6-16 oly2 8-6-16 thrasher 8-6-16 venus

Summer Olympic Update:

  • It’s good to see the Belgian ego embellished … nice job Avermaet.
  • The Ginny Thrasher story will be shown on the big screen, that is a virtual certainty. An amazing journey for the Mountaineer, who surmounts the odds, including a daunting challenge from the two-time Chinese gold medalist to claim a gold of her own.
  • Venus isn’t in a very talkative mood, after failing to flip the switch against Flipkens.
  • US vs. China in Men’s Basketball…just not fair….
  • Stiff competition in the water by the land down under for the big bully on the block, US.
  • US jumps out to total medal lead, with Japan and China nipping at her heels.

Law Office of Brandon S. Chabner

A Professional Corporation — providing business and outside general counsel services, including entity formation, contract drafting and negotiation and transaction structuring.

for more information, go to and mention promo code “CHABDOG” for a 20% discount on our regular hourly rate.

Winner of Easy Reader’s 2017 Best of Beach/Best Business Attorney