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Thank you God, for letting me see this memorable manifestation of Steeler MNF magic. We had a frenzied crowd, a 100+ plus grind out game from nails Najee, George Pickens picking those catches out of the air without a care (but get that other foot down next time, it will win you more points for style than you know), a calm, cool and reflective Russ, who spread the ball around and kept our minds at ease with the flicks he had up his sleeve, Calvin Austin III with two dazzling TDs, and of course the mostly smothering defense, led by our edge rusher wrecking balls. Give the Giants credit for hanging in there, but that ridiculous perversion of a two-point conversion try was just a hopeless harbinger of bad things to come.
It could have been the one of the greatest Sundays in recent memory — instead here’s how the carnage unfolded:
–Philly pounded the Bungles repeatedly and without mercy in the second half, after things had started rather favorably for Cincy. Hurts was on target and the tush push, not to mention the rest of the Eagle rushing attack, showed up. And I don’t know what happened to the revitalized Bungle d-line. No, there was no vitality. My bad.
— The irresponsible Ravens fiddled and diddled there way to a loss, one that they truly deserved. Famous Jameis is again famous, and they’re doing the crab leg walk in the dog pound. Again, my bad.
— The Lions did show up in a big way. Dorothy Dawn, your bad. Yes, they were more than interested. Pat myself on the freaking back for that ballsy call… lol
— My Cardinals (no… Gidget’s Cardinals) made me proud by defying the big crowd that came to the return of Tua. You go Fun-sized Kyler. My good.
— The Jets walked me down the primrose path, taking a pretty commanding lead on the Patsies, only to wilt a drooping venus fly trap in the face of a furious fourth quarter dead cat bounce by New England. My bad for thinking this game would go like the encounter earlier this year at Metlife.
— Atlanta, almost unexpectedly, held on for dear life, and covered in the always up close and personal meeting with the fagged out Bucs. The Bucs did give it 110%, but now find themself in the bowels of the AFC South, save the very bottom flour inhabited by Scarolina. My good.
— The Packers had the spread handled, or at least technically in hand, until they fells asleep in the 4th, woke up with the usual 3 point win. Ditto for the Texans-Cots. My double bad.
— The Bills oil spilled the Wee-hawks. Is that a defense I’m seeing that could actually stand up to KC. My good for relying on old reliable.
— Chargers manipulate the Aints into a very predictable 18 point loss, which must have been as exciting as standing in a bank line. My good for knowing Rattler would be rattled and Harbaugh would recover his pants, lost in Arizona last week.
— Carolina continues to look not very nice with Bryce, while it increasingly appears Bo knows football again.
— Chiefs did what they often do, dominate a game but do just enough to screw me when I give them my whole hearted support. Or maybe its the Raiders screwing with me?
— Commanders really rip my heart out with that amazing hail Jaden; nearly crashed my bike on my ride home when that result flashed on my phone. Thanks Bears, and my double bad… as I changed my initial pick thinking Daniels wouldn’t be playing.
— Boyz took their eyes off of the ball, lose a lead and then nearly win (and cover); but it was all for nothing, as the final margin for the Niners was 6, not 5.5. Let’s face it,…. post-op Dak just doesn’t want to run for it, and that really limits his team’s down-the-field potentials. My bad.
Welcome back everyone to NFL WEEK 8! I would love to celebrate 11 picks right last week (Week 7) if it wasn’t me losing two by half a point. Like Vegas, we’ll have to settle with cashing in only 9/15 (60%) of my bets. Before you consider my Week 8 Scrumdidilyumptious ATS Picks here is my season resume for your review.
Resume:
WEEK 1: 10/16 (62.5%) WEEK 2: 8/15 + 1 Push (53.3%) WEEK 3: 8/16 (50%) WEEK 4: 9/16 (56%) WEEK 5: 7/14 (50%) WEEK 6: 10/14 (71%) WEEK 7: 9/15 (60%) SEASON RECORD (ATS): 61/106 + 1 Push (58%)
OK, now that we’re all caught up and you’re still willing to read my scumbag picks, lets fucking go NFL Week 8 (thank you for knowing that you still have a better shot with my picks below than LITERALLY flipping a quarter)!
THURSDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL:
OK…I messed up royally and expected much more from the Vikings. Of course, Cooper Kupp and Puka Nacua come back from the IR for the Rams like rock stars and blow the Vikings out of the water. It is what it is. Unlike the past two Thursdays, I didn’t take the chalk…but consciously picked the Vikings to do better even though they are the chalk…no bueno….one pick already in the gutter.
VIKINGS -3.5 @NewportBest_ https://t.co/rNRlpYkKm0 pic.twitter.com/hHCqyqv13o
— Abe Miranda (@gawdbrudder) October 25, 2024
| | @gawdbrudder
Baltimore by at least 10… why not. Going Baltimore in Brown town.
Detroit by over 10 against the Titans. Why not. Going Detroit.
Arizona gets it close against Miami. Arizona.
Jets by at least 7 against New England. Why not. Jets.
Atlanta getting 2.5 against the beaten up Bucs. I’ll make some bucks on that one. Atlanta
Going with the Bears Sunday unless Jaden Daniels’ prognosis changes. Bears to win.
Jville is on a roll and will beat the 4.5 spread. Green Bay didn’t cover last week and they won’t this week with the Jags.
Houston will demolish Indy. Going Houston.
Chargers will get well against the Saints, even though they have no running game. Saints have no “game”. Taking Chargers giving with the ridiculous 7.5
Bufffalo giving 2.5 against the Sea-men… Yes going Buffalo
Cincy gets by Phlly by 3. Taking Cincy.
Denver by more than a TD against Scarolina. As with Elway’s two Super seasons, the winning here will be back to back.
Vegas has mailed it in. Going with the Chiefs giving 10.5
Dallas will come back strong against SF, which is depleted. Taking Cowboys getting 5.5.
5.5 is usually a ton of points for the Steelers, but look who they’re playing. Going Steelers.
I was doing very well last week up until Monday Night Football. The Pittsburgh lock worked out well thanks to the Jets’ continued incompetence and Washington predictably destroyed Carolina despite the injury to Jayden Daniels that will torpedo my fantasy football season. My card was looking really good when Tampa Bay jumped out to an early lead on Baltimore, but then Lamar Jackson ruined all the fun and Baker Mayfield threw a pair of mind-numbing interceptions to help him out. In the ESPN+ game that no one watched, the Chargers failed to reach the end zone and lost to the Cardinals while Cameron Dicker scored more fantasy points than Kyler Murray to hand me a fantasy loss in a match that I had in the bag. Talk about the worst of both worlds.
So that is how I ended up 7-8 and below .500 for a third straight week. The overall record is 49-57-1. Let’s turn it around!
Minnesota at LA Rams +3.5
The Vikings finally suffered a loss last Sunday against Detroit in a game that I correctly predicted. The Rams just beat Las Vegas to keep their season from totally imploding, and an upset over the Vikings could be a big part of Los Angeles’ turnaround. The return of Cooper Kupp and the Rams’ 2-1 record at home this season will give them the edge. Ram it!
Baltimore -9.5 at Cleveland
The Ravens are a juggernaut and I cannot bet against them again until they slow down. Maybe it will be this week against Cleveland’s tough defense and some Jameis Winston magic. I will take my chances with that.
Tennessee at Detroit -10.5
Jared Goff just doesn’t throw incomplete passes anymore and the Titans have even less of a passing offense than before because they traded DeAndre Hopkins.
Arizona +3.5 at Miami
Tua Tagovailoa is coming back to rescue the Dolphins even though the Twitter doctors haven’t cleared him yet. I don’t know how that is legal. I will give Tua a week to shake the rust off and go with the frisky Cardinals.
NY Jets at New England +6.5
Another Jets line that makes no sense. The New England offense has been revived by Drake Maye and the Jets’ defense collapsed in Russell Wilson’s Pittsburgh debut. The Jets are desperate, but maybe not in a good way.
Atlanta at Tampa Bay -2.5
The Falcons’ momentum was suddenly stopped with a surprise ass kicking at the hands of the Seahawks. Tampa Bay also got beat down horribly, but at least that was against a dominant team. The Buccaneers will be looking for revenge after their thrilling overtime loss in Atlanta three weeks ago. That revenge should be served if the defense just shows up a little bit.
Chicago at Washington +0.5
Here is the dirty little secret that no one is talking about: Washington’s offense didn’t slow down much when Marcus Mariota was under center last Sunday. The Commies can win this with our without Jayden Daniels.
Green Bay -4.5 at Jacksonville
The Packers have won five of six with four of the five wins coming by more than four points. Plus, I just traded Jordan Love away in fantasy and he is guaranteed to go off. The Jaguars got a much-needed win last week, but that doesn’t mean they are back to fulfilling expectations.
Indianapolis +5.5 at Houston
Anthony Richardson has been very disappointing this season, but against Houston in Week 1 he had his best game of the season. Plus, Jonathan Taylor looks like he is ready to return to action. That should allow the Colts to pound the ball and keep it away from C.J. Stroud.
New Orleans +7.5 at LA Chargers
Why do I keep dooming my picks with the Saints? They have gone from unstoppable juggernaut to one of the worst teams in the league. I am picking them again because the number is way too high against the feeble Chargers offense.
Buffalo -2.5 at Seattle
The Seahawks got a nice road win last week, but their defense has been dreadful lately, even at home. Buffalo should be able to run up the score.
Philadelphia at Cincinnati -2.5
Are the Bengals back? Their three wins have come against the Panthers, Giants, and Browns. However, Philadelphia hasn’t beaten anyone decent since Week 1. I am making an anti-Philly pick that is amplified by my fantasy match against Jalen Hurts and A.J. Brown.
Carolina at Denver -7.5
The Panthers stink and Bryce Young is back under center. Plus, Diontae Johnson and Adam Thielen are missing the game due to injury. The line has risen to 10.5, so let’s take advantage.
Kansas City at Las Vegas +10.5
You’re welcome, Kansas City! I keep picking against the Chiefs, and they keep winning despite their wide receiver injuries. Can DeAndre Hopkins give them some relief? He might be washed up, but he’s also getting a huge quarterback upgrade. Remember that Antonio Pierce led Las Vegas to a shocking upset at Arrowhead last year.
Dallas at San Francisco -5.5
Wow, I really thought the Cowboys had their act together after that gritty win in Pittsburgh, but then they got embarrassed by Detroit in Jerry World. Imagine if Russ had been ready to cook just a little earlier? These Cowboys could be 2-4! The 49ers have also been disappointing, but I think they will take their frustration out on Dallas.
NY Giants +5.5 at Pittsburgh
The Steelers’ offense was rejuvenated with Russell Wilson under center and they impressively routed the Jets last week while the Giants were totally feeble against Philadelphia. The Giants should get crushed here, but that’s what I thought before the Seattle game, so I am sticking with Big Blue this time.
In my opinion, these 5 are all worthy of enshrinment. A. Clay Matthews was brute force as linebacker, cracking heads and taking no prisoners for 19 years, as integral member of a few Browns teams during the Schottenheimer Era. He was responsible for a mind numbing 1600 or so tackles and about 83 sacks, and in the process instilled fear and trepidation in countless jittery running backs and slick stepping receivers who dared to come across the middle. B. Joe Jacoby, the monster-sized boss hog, who was so large (six foot 7, 305) he seemed to cover about 1/2 of the o-line all by himself. Jacoby played his entire career for the Redskins, won 3 Super Bowls and made 2 All Pros. C. Sterling Sharpe was extremely sharp during a very productive 7 year career, in which he caught nearly 600 passes, and helped Brett Favre make history. 3 All pro teams, 65 TDs and lots of dazzling runs after catches. D. Chuck Foreman, who shaked and baked his way to glory … but no Super Bowl titles… in the 1970s. Chuck was synonomous with the great Viking teams of the 1970s and ran with an almost acrobatic, physical style that those who witnessed will sure remember. Nearly 6,000 years in 7 seasons, along with over 350 pass receptions… he was elusive and powerful, and a serious competitor. E. Jim “Wrong Way” Marshall is more famous for his big blunder — running the wrong way and into his own end zone after recovering a fumble — than anything else. But this was a guy who was tough, reliable and showed up for work for an incredible 270 consecutive games, a record that would stand until Brett Favre went for 297. He recovered 30 fumbles over a 20 year career, and ruined plays for countess QBs, as part of the devastating Purple People Eater pass rush, alongside Hall of Famer Alan Page and Karl Eller. It’s time to put Jim in!
It’s time for ChabDog’s Happy Idiot Week 8 Sports Rock Pool Predictions:
Thank you Brian Keller for the kind words of intro (I am not Worthy, but I’m always willing to try and come up with my best for the big game): That being said, week 8 is a time to say a prayer for the pretenders, and for those who are running empty, to fill up or get the hell off the road, so here goes (WINNING TEAM IN ALL CAPS, AND NO I AM NOT PICKING TENNESSEE TO BEAT ANYONE LOL):
1) TNF — Get serious… the VIKES will atone for last week’s weakness and sacrifice the Rams at the alter.
2) I probably shot myself in the football foot for picking a game with the ffing Falcons, but jeez Louise, they are healthy and Bucs are beaten and broken. FALCONS crest by TB on the strength of Koo’s shoe.
3) The bend in the round is the BENGALS turning the corner and moving to .500; I am not buying into the myth that the Eagles are flying straight. Go with Cincy.
4) My new commandment is that the COMMANDERS command my respect. Sorry Bears.
5) BILLS continue to look super duper with Amari Cooper; sorry Sea-men.
6) A true cupcake game for the CHIEFS…
7) Two teams going in the same, wrong direction… but the 49ERS almost never lose 2 in a row at home and the Dallas fraydsters were flat out ruined last week by the Motown marauders.
9. Please… STEELERS kick the G-men to the curb on Monday Night without giving Daniel Jones curb feelers. Look for both Fields and Mr. Wilson to have big games. YEAH!!!!!
1941, 1947, 1949, 1952, 1953, 1955, 1956, 1963, 1977, 1978, 1981… and 2024
Yanks dominated early on, but Dodgers have held their own lately, with the teams splitting the last six…
What gives? Dodgers have the intangibles and better relief pitching… .
Dodgers in 7, and this thing goes into November?
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Law Offices of Brandon S. Chabner
Brandon’s Posts
Thank you God, for letting me see this memorable manifestation of Steeler MNF magic….
Thank you God, for letting me see this memorable manifestation of Steeler MNF magic. We had a frenzied crowd, a 100+ plus grind out game from nails Najee, George Pickens picking those catches out of the air without a care (but get that other foot down next time, it will win you more points for style than you know), a calm, cool and reflective Russ, who spread the ball around and kept our minds at ease with the flicks he had up his sleeve, Calvin Austin III with two dazzling TDs, and of course the mostly smothering defense, led by our edge rusher wrecking balls. Give the Giants credit for hanging in there, but that ridiculous perversion of a two-point conversion try was just a hopeless harbinger of bad things to come.
ChabDog’s Post-mortem for Bloody Sunday, October 27, 2024
It could have been the one of the greatest Sundays in recent memory — instead here’s how the carnage unfolded:
–Philly pounded the Bungles repeatedly and without mercy in the second half, after things had started rather favorably for Cincy. Hurts was on target and the tush push, not to mention the rest of the Eagle rushing attack, showed up. And I don’t know what happened to the revitalized Bungle d-line. No, there was no vitality. My bad.
— The irresponsible Ravens fiddled and diddled there way to a loss, one that they truly deserved. Famous Jameis is again famous, and they’re doing the crab leg walk in the dog pound. Again, my bad.
— The Lions did show up in a big way. Dorothy Dawn, your bad. Yes, they were more than interested. Pat myself on the freaking back for that ballsy call… lol
— My Cardinals (no… Gidget’s Cardinals) made me proud by defying the big crowd that came to the return of Tua. You go Fun-sized Kyler. My good.
— The Jets walked me down the primrose path, taking a pretty commanding lead on the Patsies, only to wilt a drooping venus fly trap in the face of a furious fourth quarter dead cat bounce by New England. My bad for thinking this game would go like the encounter earlier this year at Metlife.
— Atlanta, almost unexpectedly, held on for dear life, and covered in the always up close and personal meeting with the fagged out Bucs. The Bucs did give it 110%, but now find themself in the bowels of the AFC South, save the very bottom flour inhabited by Scarolina. My good.
— The Packers had the spread handled, or at least technically in hand, until they fells asleep in the 4th, woke up with the usual 3 point win. Ditto for the Texans-Cots. My double bad.
— The Bills oil spilled the Wee-hawks. Is that a defense I’m seeing that could actually stand up to KC. My good for relying on old reliable.
— Chargers manipulate the Aints into a very predictable 18 point loss, which must have been as exciting as standing in a bank line. My good for knowing Rattler would be rattled and Harbaugh would recover his pants, lost in Arizona last week.
— Carolina continues to look not very nice with Bryce, while it increasingly appears Bo knows football again.
— Chiefs did what they often do, dominate a game but do just enough to screw me when I give them my whole hearted support. Or maybe its the Raiders screwing with me?
— Commanders really rip my heart out with that amazing hail Jaden; nearly crashed my bike on my ride home when that result flashed on my phone. Thanks Bears, and my double bad… as I changed my initial pick thinking Daniels wouldn’t be playing.
— Boyz took their eyes off of the ball, lose a lead and then nearly win (and cover); but it was all for nothing, as the final margin for the Niners was 6, not 5.5. Let’s face it,…. post-op Dak just doesn’t want to run for it, and that really limits his team’s down-the-field potentials. My bad.
Well Read’s Posts
Abe’s Posts
Week 8: Abe’s Scrumdidilyumptious NFL Picks (ATS)
Welcome back everyone to NFL WEEK 8! I would love to celebrate 11 picks right last week (Week 7) if it wasn’t me losing two by half a point. Like Vegas, we’ll have to settle with cashing in only 9/15 (60%) of my bets. Before you consider my Week 8 Scrumdidilyumptious ATS Picks here is my season resume for your review.
Resume:
WEEK 1: 10/16 (62.5%) WEEK 2: 8/15 + 1 Push (53.3%) WEEK 3: 8/16 (50%) WEEK 4: 9/16 (56%) WEEK 5: 7/14 (50%) WEEK 6: 10/14 (71%) WEEK 7: 9/15 (60%) SEASON RECORD (ATS): 61/106 + 1 Push (58%)
OK, now that we’re all caught up and you’re still willing to read my scumbag picks, lets fucking go NFL Week 8 (thank you for knowing that you still have a better shot with my picks below than LITERALLY flipping a quarter)!
THURSDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL:
OK…I messed up royally and expected much more from the Vikings. Of course, Cooper Kupp and Puka Nacua come back from the IR for the Rams like rock stars and blow the Vikings out of the water. It is what it is. Unlike the past two Thursdays, I didn’t take the chalk…but consciously picked the Vikings to do better even though they are the chalk…no bueno….one pick already in the gutter.
VIKINGS -3.5 @NewportBest_ https://t.co/rNRlpYkKm0 pic.twitter.com/hHCqyqv13o
— Abe Miranda (@gawdbrudder) October 25, 2024
| | @gawdbrudder
Week 7: Abe’s Scrumdidilyumptious NFL Picks (ATS)
WALKING INTO WEEK 7 HAVING GOTTEN TEN PICKS RIGHT AGAINST THE SPREAD LAST WEEK! Ok, CAPS may have been too much but anytime you can get double-digit wins against the spread I think there’s nothing wrong with celebrating that! So lets look at my current picks record….please see Exibit a:
Exibit a.
WEEK 1: 10/16 (62.5%) WEEK 2: 8/15 + 1 Push (53.3%) WEEK 3: 8/16 (50%) WEEK 4: 9/16 (56%) WEEK 5: 7/14 (50%) WEEK 6: 10/14 (71%) SEASON RECORD (ATS): 52/91 + 1 Push (57%)
OK, now that we’re all caught up and you’re still willing to read my scumbag picks, lets fucking go NFL Week 7 (thank you for knowing that you still have a better shot with my picks below than LITERALLY flipping a quarter)!
THURSDAY NIGHTS GAME – TOOK THE CHALK
Need to explain that I was super slammed at work and simply didn’t make my pick before kickoff. However, here at Chabdog Sports, if you don’t make a pick, you take the “chalk” (favored to win). Somehow, our official “chalk” was the New Orlean Saints….WHY???…I STILL DONT KNOW! Feel free to entertain yourself with my Twitter/X exchange with our producer, Well Read.
Really wish I had tweeted this out earlier @NewportBest_ considering the chalk were the Saints (how???) since my pick would’ve been Denver 🥴 https://t.co/2v8rIVhBnP pic.twitter.com/3C04aR20V9
— Abe Miranda (@gawdbrudder) October 18, 2024
| | @gawdbrudder
Dorothy’s Posts
Aaron’s Posts
Aaron’s Week 8 NFL Picks
I was doing very well last week up until Monday Night Football. The Pittsburgh lock worked out well thanks to the Jets’ continued incompetence and Washington predictably destroyed Carolina despite the injury to Jayden Daniels that will torpedo my fantasy football season. My card was looking really good when Tampa Bay jumped out to an early lead on Baltimore, but then Lamar Jackson ruined all the fun and Baker Mayfield threw a pair of mind-numbing interceptions to help him out. In the ESPN+ game that no one watched, the Chargers failed to reach the end zone and lost to the Cardinals while Cameron Dicker scored more fantasy points than Kyler Murray to hand me a fantasy loss in a match that I had in the bag. Talk about the worst of both worlds.
So that is how I ended up 7-8 and below .500 for a third straight week. The overall record is 49-57-1. Let’s turn it around!
Minnesota at LA Rams +3.5
The Vikings finally suffered a loss last Sunday against Detroit in a game that I correctly predicted. The Rams just beat Las Vegas to keep their season from totally imploding, and an upset over the Vikings could be a big part of Los Angeles’ turnaround. The return of Cooper Kupp and the Rams’ 2-1 record at home this season will give them the edge. Ram it!
Baltimore -9.5 at Cleveland
The Ravens are a juggernaut and I cannot bet against them again until they slow down. Maybe it will be this week against Cleveland’s tough defense and some Jameis Winston magic. I will take my chances with that.
Tennessee at Detroit -10.5
Jared Goff just doesn’t throw incomplete passes anymore and the Titans have even less of a passing offense than before because they traded DeAndre Hopkins.
Arizona +3.5 at Miami
Tua Tagovailoa is coming back to rescue the Dolphins even though the Twitter doctors haven’t cleared him yet. I don’t know how that is legal. I will give Tua a week to shake the rust off and go with the frisky Cardinals.
Aaron’s Week 7 NFL Picks
It is Week 7 already and I am stuck in a midseason rut. I have been under .500 for two straight weeks, and now all I want to do is pick chalk. It is probably because favorites did so well in Week 6. Let’s see if the trend continues!
Denver at New Orleans -1.5
This one is already dead. It’s probably because Denver was favored at kickoff. I just have to come to terms with the Broncos being a decent team. The Saints have now lost five straight since their scintillating start and Spencer Rattler is probably a career backup.
New England +4.5 vs. Jacksonville
Back to London for the Jaguars, who were crushed by the Bears over there last Sunday. Should Jacksonville be favored by more than a field goal against anybody? Maybe the Patriots, because they haven’t covered since their narrow defeat vs. Seattle in Week 2. Still, I am going with New England and its new rookie quarterback.
Seattle at Atlanta -2.5
The Seahawks have been dreadful defensively while losing three in a row. The Falcons are on a roll with three straight wins over NFC South rivals. I am picking Atlanta and hoping that gambling really is this easy.
Tennessee at Buffalo -8.5
Will Levis threw for 95 yards in Tennessee’s loss to Indianapolis last week. That is not going to be enough to keep up with Buffalo and new addition Amari Cooper!
Aaron’s Week 6 NFL Picks
Last week stunk for me. I had just crawled back to .500 and instead of keeping the momentum going, I fell into another hole with a 5-9 week. That’s what I get for picking against my Giants, and that’s one mistake I won’t make again this week. There are other mistakes that I am very willing to repeat, though.
San Francisco -3.5 at Seattle
Fading San Francisco worked out well in Week 5, as it blew another fourth quarter lead to a division rival. This is becoming a disturbing trend for Kyle Shanahan’s team. However, I can’t go with Seattle again after they returned a fumble 102 yards against my Giants and STILL lost by nine.
Jacksonville at Chicago -1.5
The Jaguars have resurrected themselves somewhat with two straight covers (1-1 straight up) after being humiliated by Buffalo on Monday Night Football. I am still fading them, though. That’s because the Bears are HOT HOT HOT with two straight wins that covered the spread. Plus, Caleb Williams is coming off the best game of his young career.
Arizona +4.5 at Green Bay
It is tough to figure this Cardinals team out, but I have picked their games correctly for two weeks in a row. Green Bay should win this game because its only two losses are close ones against Minnesota and Philly, but I like Arizona’s offense too much. I will hope for a field goal game.
Aaron’s Week 5 NFL Picks
Thanks to last week’s brilliant 10-6 performance, I am 31-32-1, and that is a .500 record if you include the Atlanta win already in the books for this week. It took a while, but we finally climbed out of that Week 1 hole. Next stop, profitability?!
Tampa Bay at Atlanta -2.5
I booked it with Well Read before the game on Thursday, so it is going down as a win! Thanks go out to Captain Kirko and my fantasy darling Drake London!
NY Jets vs. Minnesota -2.5
Finally, the Vikings are favored, but this game isn’t in Minnesota; it is in London. The Jets looked legit when they stomped New England, but then they went right back into pretender mode with an ugly home loss to Denver. I will keep riding these Vikings!
Carolina +4.5 at Chicago
The Panthers came back down to Earth last week with a loss vs. Cincinnati, but the Carolina offense continued to look legit with Andy Dalton under center. That will help the Panthers defeat Chicago outright on Sunday!
Baltimore at Cincinnati +2.5
Speaking of offense, the Bengals have scored 72 points over their last two games. They might only need one or two stops on defense to beat Baltimore.
Aaron’s Week 4 NFL Picks
Wow! It’s already Week 4! We should have all of these NFL teams figured out by now, right? I agree that I should have them figured out, but I have not yet obtained the level of sharpness to do just that. It has bee nice to hover around .500 for the last two weeks after a disastrous Week 1, but that still means we’re down overall. Time to start the comeback!
Dallas at NY Giants +6.5
Picking the Giants finally paid off against Cleveland, so why should I stop now? The Cowboys can’t run the ball, and that will allow the Big Blue pass rush to beat down Dak Prescott. It is a little sad how excited I am to see Daniel Jones’ face on the “Just checking in to see if y’all still dem Boys” meme.
Saints at Falcons -2.5
Atlanta might have had the toughest starting schedule in the entire NFL, so even though 1-2 isn’t great, the Falcons still have plenty of chances to improve their record. That starts against the rival Saints, who were finally slowed down by the Eagles last week.
LA Rams +3.0 at Bears
Did the Rams’ comeback against the 49ers just not happen? Sure, they still have a lot of injuries, but Caleb Williams is still very prone to mistakes with two interceptions in each of his last two games. This should at least be a pick ’em. It feels like we are stepping into a trap, but I will take my chances with the advantage at head coach and quarterback.
Minnesota +2.5 at Green Bay
Just keep riding the Vikings. That is the directive here. Yes, Green Bay has been very impressive with a close loss to Philadelphia followed by two wins with Malik Willis under center. I’m just going to keep riding this Viking ship as long as it is an underdog.
Steelers -1.5 at Colts
The Colts beat the Bears last week, but I am off of them until Anthony Richardson shows improvement. He is completing less than half of his passes on the season and not rushing enough to make up for it. The Steelers’ defense will eat him for lunch.
Denver +7.5 at NY Jets
I’m not taking Denver’s big win at Tampa Bay super seriously just yet, but both of the Broncos’ losses came by a touchdown, so I’ll ride with them here.
Philadelphia at Tampa Bay +2.5
I am hoping the Bucs bounce back after their bizarre loss to Denver at home. They did blow out Philly in the Playoffs last season.
Cincinnati -5.5 at Carolina
It’s the Andy Dalton revenge game! But Joe Burrow and the Bengals need it much more and their offense was pretty great in the loss to Washington. They should score enough to cover this as long as the Red Rifle doesn’t play like an MVP again.
Jacksonville at Houston -6.5
Both of these teams were embarrassed last week. At least the Texans have played good football at some point this season.
Washington +3.5 at Arizona
I keep going back and forth on whether Arizona is good or not. Jayden Daniels is showing great poise for a rookie, though. He should keep this game close even if Washington’s horrible defense keeps bleeding points.
New England at San Francisco -10.5
The 49ers need to destroy someone to reestablish dominance. Last week was a disaster for them, and they can’t even use injuries as an excuse since Jauan Jennings was so good.
Cleveland at Las Vegas -2.0
This is so gross. The Browns are horrible, and the Raiders just laid an egg at home to Carolina. I don’t think Cleveland can score on anyone, though.
Kansas City at LA Chargers +7.5
I don’t know why this line is so high. I am sticking with Jim Harbaugh after the setback last week. He knows how to pound the ball and keep possession away from Patrick Mahomes, but it might not even matter with how mid he has been the last two weeks.
Buffalo +2.5 at Baltimore
The Buffalo offense is better without Stefon Diggs. It has scored over 30 points in all three games and we will keep riding it and circling the wagons.
Tennessee at Miami -1.5
Miami needs to win this one after being shocked by the Titans last year in a game that cost the Dolphins a division title. Plus, Miami has a chance to stay relevant in the hunt for the Playoffs with upcoming games at New England and Indianapolis. I’m hoping Mike McDaniel can figure out how to win one without Tua Tagovailoa.
Seattle at Detroit -3.5
The Seahawks are 3-0, but they have played feeble competition. I’ll lay the points with the Lions.