Because sports should never run your life ... retorts for sports

NFL Update, Recap and Perspectives, Sunday, 9-15-19:

NFL Update:
  • Jags’ master plan to steal a win in Houston hits a crucial snag when Fournette is met with serious resistance on the doorstep of the goal line. Too bad Marrone forgot how to add. 7 plus 6 equals 13 and potential overtime. #Jaguars #Texans
  • Seattle gets a measure of revenge for the 2006 Super Bowl, with a narrow win in Pittsburgh. For Steeler fans, the emergence of Mason Rudolf is a big positive; however, it’s overshadowed by much bigger problems on both sides of the ball … including critical lapses in the secondary and getting dominated on the line of scrimmage/failing to stop the run, as well as a lack of playmakers at wide receiver and a less-than-threatening running game. And what was going on on the 3 and forever play near game’s end, when the stadium knew Wilson would be using his legs to get into field goals range … where’s a good spy when you need one?

    This team’s not getting it done with the current group, and that includes Tomlin.

  • This was a totally rational game, in which the Chiefs’ offense did anything and everything they wanted to do to the pitiful Raider resistance in the 2nd quarter, and then, quite understandably, got extremely bored and took the rest of the afternoon off … and without any adverse consequences. #Chiefs #Raiders
  • There was no miracle in Miami today for the Dullphins … just the grim reality of utter and complete domination at the hands of the Patriots, who never looked threatened and spent the day in total and complete control. Beautiful if you are a NE fan; boring as sin if you are anybody else. #Patriots #Dolphins
  • Heady game for Lamar, who realized what he couldn’t do with his arm, he had to do with his legs. As for the Cardinals, give them credit for hanging around and hanging up enough points to make this interesting … courtesy in no small part to some fancy passing from new kid Kyler. #Cardinals #Ravens
  • Bengal defense was particularly galling (or should we say appalling), as the match ups go decidedly in favor of QB Garoppolo. #FortyNiners #Bengals
  • Chargers were missing their kicker, and with the missed field goals and PAT could not have been sicker; that being said, this was heinous loss for the visitors, who shot themselves in the feet over and over and over again with bonehead penalties and stupid coaching decisions (at some point, isn’t it advisable to play to your strength and play for touchdowns?). It’s a long season, but something tells me LAC will be very sorry they let this one get away. #Chargers #Lions
  • As usual, Rogers has no problem outplaying Cousins, and the rest of the Viking offense just can’t pick up the slack against the Pack. #Vikings #Packers
  • Giants have Barkley, but Bill have more with Gore and an efficient Josh Allen. As for Manning, he’s proving to be a real Eliability. #Bills #Giants
  • Dak leads a Dallas attack that left the slower Redskins looking like they had lead in their boots. #Cowboys #Redskins
  • Lots of D on display in Denver; unfortunately for the home team, the instant O belonged to Pineiro, whose big boot makes him a hero. #Bears #Broncos
  • Breezy, pleasant day on the Left Coast it was not for the Brees-less Saints, who are left to languish with 9 measly points when Bridgewater just can’t bridge the leadership gap. Rams get clicking in the 2nd half with super touchdown by Cooper and a return to rugged and reliable running by Gurley. #Saints #Rams
  • Irony in ATL, with Philly being patient and opportunistic with the ball, but getting carelessly aggressive when trying to stop the home team in their final drive. Flawed Falcons survive. #Eagles #Falcons
Categories: NFL

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Saturday, 9-14-19:

MLB Update:

  • Dodgers need to remind themselves that they are still playing for something … have they looked at ATL’s record recently? #Dodgers #Mets
  • Big win for the Bosox, who ride the shutdown pitching of E-rod to keep a glimmer of hope alive in the AL race. #RedSox #Phillies
  • Twins come close to casting the knockout blow with a double dip dunking of the sinking Indians. #Twins #Indians
  • Cubs do what Cubs do and club the Pirates to death like innocent baby seals. #Pirates #Cubs
Categories: MLB

NCAAF Top 25 Update, Recap and Perspectives, Saturday, 9-14-19:

NCAAF Top 25 Update:
  • Joe the Tiger is looking more and more like Tom the Patriot with every passing week. #Tigers #Demons
  • Powerful, well-coached OU draws first blood … and then some … with its Hurts to Lamb and Rambo combos. The UCLA football program is in complete shambles … nothing less than a total joke/disgrace. Thanks for absolutely nothing chubby Chip; your QB hasn’t a semblance of a clue, your offensive “schemes” are non-existent, and the defense is a farce. In all fairness, refunds are in order for the fans who had to sit through this butt kicking in person. #Sooners #Bruins
  • One of the orange teams on the field at the Carrier Dome looked like a real lemon … and it wasn’t Clemson. #Tigers #Orange
  • A&M looks to Lamar for a very tasty cupcake day at College Station. #Cardinals #Aggies
  • Texas takes its frustrations out by boiling Rice, after getting hornswaggled the week before by the Bayou Bengals. #Longhorns #Owls
  • UVa’s actually tied atop the ACC at 2-0; what does this say about the ACC? Not much… #Seminoles #Cavaliers
  • Iowa takes aim at Iowa St., goes into Ames and wrestles the Cy-Hawk trophy away from the ‘Clones. #Hawkeyes #Cyclones
  • Party time in Provo as the true blue believers at BYU spoil an evening out for the University of Spoiled Children. #Trojans #Cougars
  • Notre Dame throws the Book at Los Lobos, and it’s more than the visitors can handle in one sitting. #FightingIrish #Lobos
  • Sun Devils indulge themselves at East Lansing, at the expense of sputtering Spartans. No, the offense was not really working today with Leuwenwerk at the helm. #SunDevils #Spartans
  • Stanford travels to the land of Disney World and leaves in a world of hurt. Their offense definitely lacks sizzle, and the Knights continue to remind the world that they’re a power team, notwithstanding their non-power conference. #Cardinal #Knights
  • Pitt clanks a field goal instead of manning up and going for a game tying score. With 5 min left / down by 7 is this really going for the win? Naruduzzi does his best to rationalize, but the fact is, against PSU you can never show uncertainty, doubt or weakness … particularly that close to a game tying score. #Panthers #NittanyLions
  • Turtles’ shell game comes to an abrupt end in Philadelphia, as Owls prove yet again to be highly competitive fowl. #Terrapins #Owls
  • The Ohio State University rudely invades Bloomington and makes things pretty gloomy for the outclassed Hoosiers. #Buckeyes #Hoosiers
  • Dawgs send the Wolves a nasty love letter from Fromm, and the rest is cupcake history. #RedWolves #Bulldogs
  • Crimson Tide takes it Tua the Gamecocks, and that’s not something South Carolina cared for too much. #CrimsonTide #Gamecocks

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Friday, 9-13-19:

MLB Update:

  • Goldy’s proved to be quite a jewel for the Redbirds, who continue to run roughshod over their competition in the NL East. It also helps that Wainwright’s fancy curve is dancing just right. #Brewers #Cardinals
  • Cubs overjoyed to capitalize on the many faults of one Steven Brault, who is tagged and battered like few others in a nightmarish stint in that house of Pittsburgh horrors that is Wrigley. #Pirates #Cubs
  • Oakland roughs up the Rangers behind the ultra athletic Khris Davis. #Athletics #Rangers
Categories: MLB

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Thursday, 9-12-19:

MLB Update:

  • Never-say-die Mets keep ‘a comin, with another nuking of the disappearing D-backs. Looks like this drama may well go right down to the regular season wire. #Diamondbacks #Mets
  • Don’t tell Milwaukee they’re dead and buried; Brewers still have plenty of Braun left in their lineup, and have now won 8 straight. #Brewers #Marlins
  • Cards go off more than half cocked against the defenseless Rockies, unleashing for a handful of homers and avoiding what could have been an unforgivable 4-game sweep at the hands of Colorado’s cream puffs. #Cardinals #Rockies
  • Bucs are clucking now that they’ve left San Fran with the rubber game in their pocket, as well as a possible key out of the Central Division cellar (only 3 games behind the Reds). On occasion it does appear they’ve found a treasure trove with Musgrove. #Pirates #Giants
  • Red Sox rise up and bid a fond farewell to the Blue Jays North of the Border, while taking the concept of bullpen by committee to a ridiculously sublime extreme. #RedSox #BlueJays
  • Can the A’s do the impossible and make a consistent winner of formerly hapless Homer Bailey? He’s now an impressive 13-8, and by all accounts pitching nothing short of great. #Athletics #Astros
  • Twins were hoping for a little r&r but after a rough tussle with the Natties their looking more than a bit peaked. #Nationals #Twins
Categories: MLB

NFL Update, Recap and Perspectives, Thursday, 9-12-19:

NFL Update:

  • Tampa’s always Famous Jameis outplays Carolina’s flimsy flam Cam in an undistinguished battle of NFC South also rans. Newton did throw for something on the order of 333, but wasn’t very efficient (under 50% in completions) and fell apart like a cheap suit in the red zone. Not only is his directional compass off, but he’s evidently unwilling to resume use of his big body to and powerful legs to gain critical yards as a scrambler. This deficiency was most obvious on the Panther’s final offensive play, as Rivera chose to try a misdirection with little McCaffrey to the outside, instead of going straight ahead and downhill with their big QB when all they needed was a yard or two. And congrats to Arians for imposing some defensive austerity on the princes of pewter … it’s about time. #Buccaneers #Panthers
Categories: NFL

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Wednesday, 9-11-19:

MLB Update:

  • A’s continue to show they aren’t afraid of anyone, least of all the Astros. Watch out for this team in the playoffs; they’ve got just enough of everything, and that’s scary. #Athletics #Astros
  • Nationals push back against the hard hitting Twins with their big meal ticket, the USS Strasburg, who steams ahead for his 17th win. #Naitonals #Twins
  • After everything they’ve been through the resilient Mets whack the D-backs and find themselves smack dab in the middle of the playoff pack. #Mets #Diamondbacks
  • More misery for the listless Red Sox, who are really starting to look like one of those out-of-the-October money teams mailing it in in September. #RedSox #BlueJays
Categories: MLB

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Tuesday, 9-10-19:

MLB Update:

  • In a most interesting development, the Tigers get to 100 losses and now try to argue they aren’t really as bad as the Yankees are good. #Yankees #Tigers
  • Blue Jay season is done, but the next few weeks could help this group of talented youngsters build up their confidence for next year; if they can get some pitching, this team could at least be respectable. #RedSox #BlueJays
  • A’s give the strutting Stros a taste of their own medicine. #Athletics #Astros
  • Mets eke out a win over the traveling janitors from AZ and stay regular. #Mets #Diamondbacks
  • Phils continue fight the good fight, coming up with a huge gut check victory over the high flying Braves. There’s no reason this team can’t take it down to the wire in its fight with the Cubs for the 2nd wc. #Braves #Phillies
  • Brewer playoff aspirations are cut off at the knees with most unfortunate foul bal injury suffered by superstar Yelich. Ouch!!! #Brewers
Categories: MLB

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Monday, 9-9-19:

MLB Update:

  • Yankees blank the Red Sox behind the immortal James Paxton, and Boston’s playoff hopes fade into oblivion … I don’t care how many games we have left with Tampa Bay. And by the way, good riddance for Dumbrowski. #RedSox #Yankees
  • Pirates put on their rally caps in the ninth inning … how often does that happen? Maybe they can loan some of this offensive mojo to the comatose Steelers… #Pirates #Giants
  • Astros serve notice that their offense is just as potent as the Yankees’ by proceeding to set fire to Mike Fiers’ gaudy resume for 2019. This was one helluva a whupping … one that the A’s won’t soon forget, even if they happen to draw the wild card. #Athletics #Astros
  • Cubs bulk up with some man-sized run production in Man Diego, with new guy Nico leading the way. #Cubs #Padres
Categories: MLB

NFL Update, Recap and Perspectives, Monday, 9-9-19:

NFL Update:

  • Wildly entertaining game starts off the first night of Monday night football, as the Saints scramble miraculously for a last second, mongo field goal by the kicker with the shortest name in football. Neither team showed much defense, but what was perhaps most impressive was the way Watson held his own against Drew Brees. As for New Orleans, the defensive effort was in one word “weak”, and if you seriously intend to contend for attendance at this year’s big game, that dog just won’t hunt. #Texans #Saints
  • Kudos to the Raiders, who put the Antonio Brown circus behind them, and get down to the nitty gritty details of football execution in Week 1. This was definitely one of the most complete, competent games we’ve seen from the Silver and Black in a long time, and reflects solid coaching by Gruden and what appears to be a healthy, optimistic and aggressive Carr; however, KC comes to town next week, we’ll see whether harsh reality sets in quickly to obscure this moment of glory. #Broncos #Raiders
Categories: NFL

NFL Update, Recap and Perspectives, Sunday, 9-8-19:


NFL Update:

  • Same old story for the somnolent Steelers, who sleep walk through another nightmarish opener. Shame on the front office for letting Tomlin repeat past mistakes … bringing a team to the starting gun with no real game plan on offense, including a completely pathetic running game and a very predicable passing routine. 21 yards for James Connor? 1 catch by the tight end? Relying on someone named Moncrief to take the pressure off of JuJu. Good grief!Congratulations to the Patriots for not losing a trace of a step from last year’s Super Bowl performance.
  • Niners were shining today, with some sparkling leadership on defense from the ever-intense Richard Sherman; as for Tampa Bay, it looks like they’ll need a lot more than Bruce Arians to turn things around … how about a compass for Famous Jameis’ continuous misfires. #FortyNiners #Buccaneers
  • G-men put up minimal resistance when it matters most in Big D; Dak had the knack for finding open receivers, and Zeke looked like all he needed was a week to get ready for work. #Giants #Cowboys
  • Another kiss your sister moment in the desert as Detroit self-destructs, and Arizona rises from the dead, but with both teams shooting themselves in foot in OT. Oh boy … what a thriller! #Lions #Cardinals
  • Bungling Bengals can’t finish properly in the red zone, and that’s a fatal flaw when you’re facing Russell Wilson at home; opportunistic Seahawks squeeze out a narrow win in game 1. #Bengals #Seahawks
  • Philly gives its fans some major heartburn, before Wentz orchestrates a stunning second half rally; give the Skins credit for coming in ready to play. After working some kinks out, the Eagles look ready to challenge the Cowboys for top best in the NFL East. #Redskins #Eagles
  • Jets do what Jets do and waste a golden opportunity for a hot start to the season, laying down to the Bills in a disastrous fourth quarter. The silver lining here was a nice debut for Bell, who did a little of everything and should help gang green win at least a few games. #Bills #Jets
  • Chiefs choke the life out of the Jags, as Mahomes looks quite at home without Tyreek Hill. He’s still got plenty of weapons, and had no problem mastering what many thought was a formidable defense. And the addition of McCoy also helps. As for Jacksonville, it looks like it’ll be another long season with star pickup Foles folding up his tent for a while with a serious injury. #Chiefs #Jaguars
  • Vikes mount and stuff the Falcons with a stifling defense and a calm, coordinated Kirk Cousins. Credit also needs to go to Dalvin Cook, who stirred the pot with his smooth running. #Falcons #Vikings
  • The decrepit Dullphin defense is so inept it makes Lamar Jackson look like a pro QB… the first act of Tanking for Tua was a complete success!
  • Rams looked ready to defend their NFC Title with a rather routine road win over the bumbling Panthers. Too many busted plays, hiccups, penalties and flubs for Rivera’s gang … meanwhile Gurley and Cupp are back and there’s no reason to believe the Rams will be wallowing in last Jan’s disappointment. #Rams #Panthers
  • So much for the new and improved Browns, who fall flat on their faces in the home opener against the rough and tough Titans. TN had not only the typically rugged running game going, but also was moving things through the air. Meanwhile, Mayfield was creating nothing but utter mayhem for his teammates with three ugly interceptions. Cleveland’s clearly still a work in progress, which means the rest of the AFC North is licking its chops. #Titans #Browns
Categories: NFL

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