Because sports should never run your life ... retorts for sports
On the “Ending our Weekend with Bernie” CDST Show (Part 2):
https://www.facebook.com/ChabDog/
On the “Ending our Weekend with Bernie” Show (Part 2):
— On this day off from work, treat yourself to a classic clip from Ferris Buehler’s day off (“roll her old bones on over here, and I’ll dig up your daughter”…”tell you what @#$#$#$, if you don’t like my policies you can just come down here and kiss my old white butt … pucker up buttercup” … “pardon my French, but you’re an asshole”)
— Who said “I was a Democratic caucus”? The same guy who said “I’m Joe Biden’s husband, and I work for Cedrick Richmond.”
— Joe Piscopo’s take on Tricky Dick … don’t miss it… (If you lie and cheat and betray a nation’s trust … people will hate you … and they’ll pay through the nose; if you really want to get inside Dick Nixon’s head, you have to use a proctoscope)
— ChabDog recalls his favorite Giants’ fan … Larry Dickman from The Enforcer (sometimes being a dork can be charming)
— We zoom in on the Pens-Caps Sunday matinee game (some color commentary from a terrific Met Division match up)
— Giving a second look at Oklahoma City; Chris Paul has those guys playing some ball
— By the way, what would it look like if NBA players put on skates?
— The challenge for getting into hockey (it’s just working too hard)
— Hillary waits, while Bloomberg baits.
— Giving mini-Mike, the elderly tyke equal time (yes the stakes are high, but what was with that prime time under-performance)
— With the mesmerizing narration of Anthony Hopkins, as Bligh narrowly escapes becoming brunch, then successfully navigates over 3600 miles to Timor without a compass, and based on nothing more than a hunch (“Row for your lives!” “Takes us next to islands, where cannibalism is taken down to a science” “All I can promise you is relentless pain and hardship … I promise you our chances for victory are fair” (hey sort of sounds like Biden))
— A very entertaining, but ultimately premature tribute to Don Criqui (no ChabDog, thankfully he is still alive and well) (listen in to relive memorable moments, including Tom Dempsey clubbing it 63 yards, Herm Edwards and the incredible fumble return that make Psarcik a dirty word in the Meadowlands, and, with broadcast buddy Trumpy, an animated war of Ohio in the early 80’s between the Marty’s Brownies and Wyche’s Bungles)
— Words worth repeating from Pete (Well-read thinks he’s being underrepresented at the polls)
— But can we come up with anything easier to spell and pronounce (and more catchy) than Buttigieg.
— Well-read unearths a particularly catchy action photo of Kaepy
— Living it up with Liberace: “Why don’t you come work for me? As what? I want to be everything to you, Scot? Why would a grown man want to adopt another grown man?”
— Sending us off with “Send it to me”
— PS — will we ever see another Corona Beer commercial, or is that brand name permanently bad karma. All we know is that hotline is not ringing off the hook.
https://www.spreaker.com/user/godefylife/ending-our-week-with-bernie-cdst-show
On the “Ending our Weekend with Bernie” CDST Show (Part 1):
https://www.spreaker.com/user/godefylife/ending-our-week-with-bernie-cdst-show
On the “Ending our Weekend with Bernie” Show:
— Frank cranks out the Soviet National Anthem
— Some of us aren’t so excited about the New Deal II, and find watching Bernie point to be a real drag
— The new heavyweight champ Tyson looks like a cross between Wepner and Quarry.
— Handicapping what’s left in the Democrat field of dreams
— It’s only February, but when I watch Uncle Joe, all I can think of is Uncle June, knocking on the neighbors door, in pajamas and asking for ice cream
— ChabDog suspects he might be more than just a Boomer … he’s a Bloomer
— Because he’s such a threat (though according to LIzzie Boredom not a tall one), to lighten the mood, maybe Mike should use Mel Brooks as a body double in the next debate?
— Lawyers use redlining … why can’t arrogant billionaires do the same?
— “Pete, you lost to my friend Joe Donnelley [and you aren’t a proven winner”. For shame Amy, since when is winning in Minny grounds for asserting executive privilege over Buttigieg.
— Lots George Steinbrenner, along with a George Peterson interlude, which gets us in the mood for more Bernie. “She’s a heartbreaker, lovemaker, dreammaker ”
— Why Rob Man-fraud doesn’t have a problem with cheating Houston keeping its big piece of metal/MLB would be placating the out-for-blood public by vacating.
— LA banking on Price being money in the playoffs (but they know starting him is a non-starter), while Rendon hails a cab for the home of the hittable Halos
— Very sad about bulldog Swagger being taken away from the Dog Pound in an open casket; later in the show we go back to the glory years of Brian Sipe, as touted by Trump and Criqui
— The perfect Pelosi, as done by Kammy Burnett productions … yes this performance raised a few eyebrows
— Tyson gives his opponent a real Marchand moment when he a wet one to Wilder
— Slogging Leafs wilt and fold when their Zamboni driver fills in as the emergency goalie … for the other team
— The significance of “Patrick” as a major name in NHL history
— On the Miracles on Ice having slid to the right
— Wrecking the Aztecs bubble
— 8 should be enough for purposes of those presently unavoidable conference tournaments (currently, basket of deplorables IUPUI could go on a magical run and get an invite)
— Who’s in the MEAC, and where do they reside? We know one is named hopeless Howard. We read out the rest, including my personal favorite …
— “I’d like to make a Botox appointment tomorrow… wait a minute, I’m Nancy Pelosi … don’t mess with me … you don’t mess with Nancy Pelosi…no way Nancy has gray hair .. rip rip… I don’t hate nobody…. I’ll drink to that ,,,, not only did I rip my State of the Union Speech, I also ripped … my birth certificate”
NBA Update, Recap and Perspectives (Saturday, February 22, 2020):
https://www.facebook.com/ChabDog/
- Heat hit the street for the 2nd half with a gift from god … the clueless, Clouseau-like Cleveland Cavaliers. #Cavaliers #Heat
- Rockets pocket a big road win against the overtaxed Jazz. #Rockets #Jazz
- Dead-in-the-water Sixers just rolled the red carpet out for Giannis, who lived next to the bucket all night. Yes, a 5-18, -18 Embeed was completely missing from the news feed. #Sixers #Bucks
- Kings take some of the sting out of a Clipper team, from which the tentacles of that master of mayhem … Pat Beverly … were noticeably missing. #Kings #Clippers
NCAAM Update, Recap and Perspectives, Saturday, 2-22-20:
https://www.facebook.com/ChabDog/
NCAAM Update:
- Childs and BYU found it to be child’s play, neutering the big-dog-on-the block Bulldogs at home. #Cougars #Bulldogs
- Just when we thought the Wolfpack might be mushing at full speed, they get distracted by ultra-athletic FSU and the sled gets stuck in the mud on Tobacco Road. This could create a fatal roadblock in NC State’s road to the Final Four. #Seminoles #Wolfpack
- Written off and left for dead, the Bruins stuff the Buffs and find themselves within a Walton whisker of the pole position in the lax Pac-12. Amazing, but certainly not unbelievable given the relative weakness of this conference. #Bruins #Buffaloes
- Louisville just kept pouring on the hot tar, all over pathetic UNC, until head Heel Roy said UNCLE. #TarHeels #Cardinals
- Dukes sputter in the Dayton play station, when their joysticks get stuck. #Dukes #Flyers
- Here we go again; Kansas is gearing up for tournament time with a full head of steam, driven tonight by a relentless, bruising performance from an unleashed Udoka. #Jayhawks #Bears
NCAAM Update, Recap and Perspectives, Friday, 2-21-20:
https://www.facebook.com/ChabDog/
NCAAM Update:
- Are those basketball stars somehow sporting Yale unis? Cornell fails to police Mahoney down low, and the Bulldogs survive double OT to remain all alone atop the competitive Ivy. This team could definitely go a round or two in the tournament. #Bulldogs #BigRed
- Harvard climbs the Ivy standings with a narrow escape at home against Princeton. #Crimson #Tigers
NBA Update, Recap and Perspectives (Friday, February 21, 2020):
https://www.facebook.com/ChabDog/
https://www.facebook.com/ChabDog/
NBA Update:
- The long and the short of it is, Paul’s addition seems to have made Adams and the rest of the Thunder one happy family, indeed. OKC overwhelms a drab Denver squad, and continues to creep into the upper echelon of the West Conference … still quite under the radar. #Nuggets #Thunder
- Toronto continues to pack a painful punch with Pascal …37 and 12… wow. #Suns #Raptors
- Another gorgeous game from Gordo takes down the T-wolves. #Celtics #Timberwolves
NBA Update, Recap and Perspectives, Thursday, 2-20-20 (click to hear some classic Coach Switzer):
https://www.facebook.com/ChabDog/
NBA Update:
- Rockets scrub and clean the slate with the scrubs from Golden State. A conference champ hasn’t decomposed this fast … since Lebron left Cleveland with those pronounced skid marks. #Rockets #Warriors
- Very impressive game from an extremely talented Young man. Mr. Trey douses the Heat with a parade of threes and frees. #Heat #Hawks
- The outcome of this unseemly beat down was never in doubt … not for a Mil-isecond. #Bucks #Pistons
NCAAM Update, Recap and Perspectives, Tuesday, 2-18-19:
https://www.facebook.com/ChabDog/
NCAAM Update:
- How about taking a flier and deducing that Dayton may finally have its date with destiny. #Flyers #Rams
- Big bad Baylor makes more hay in Big 12 play, ahead of its colossal confrontation with Kansas. #Bears #Sooners
- Stubborn Badgers plod their way to a huge conference victory against pooped out Purdue. #Boilermakers #Badgers
- Maybe it is high time for Len’s men to realize their god given potential, and return FSU to the finals for the first time since ’72; when this team is confident and clicking, they’re a formidable, fearsome foe. #Panthers #Seminoles
- Maybe it is high time for Len’s men to realize their god given potential, and return FSU to the finals for the first time since ’72; when this team is confident and clicking, they’re a formidable, fearsome foe. #Panthers #Seminoles
- No surprise that Maryland makes more room for itself atop the Big 10, while it’s no surprise that Northworstern slides further south in the conference standings. #Terrapins #Wildcats
On the “Don’t need another cup of Joe” CDST Show (Part 1):
On the CDST “Scrambled, Sunny Side Up Show” (Part 1):
— A great, great show, as Eric gives us a rare glimpse into the storehouse of sports knowledge that holds Frank’s brain
— Don’t look that-a-way … you could be in Piscataway if you’re watching football at RU
— We’re joined by Tank of Barstool Sports, who’s rumored to be in the running for the Mets as part of the A-rod consortium
— How to fix an NBA slam dunk contest (how can you jump over Taco Fall and not be able to keep up with the Joneses … no wonder there was a swearin Aaron). But seriously, why go to all that trouble.
— Who’s mind is responsible for the terribly idiotic and hopelessly meaningless new format for the NBA All-star game … you can dress this up however you want and it still looks like a pig (lip stick notwithstanding)
— Would someone please teach Giannis a post move?
— Wow, there’s a sighting of Chance the Rapper; is he related to Chauncey Gardner
— DW’s not very superhuman Superman slam gets a 49 (what a joke)
— How about that sexy acquisition by Brody’s Bunch of Jedd “Deadwood” Lowrie … ha ha ha
— An excellent, Flemingish XFL update
— A not so tender clip of McGloin
— Explaining why Raftery is known for his onions
— Why has Seton Hall left the building?
— We’re happy to announce that Rutgers has finally emerged from it’s no-hope-for the NCAA rut. What were you doing in 1991?
— Some low lights are shined on the tarnished Tar Heels; boy has that worm thrown a tizzy at the expense of despondent Roy.
— The ultimate NCAA misfit (Columbia). Yes, the college version of the Lions is even less competitive than the pro variety.
— Sorry state of affairs for Chicago State. And the University of Bob Denver isn’t any better. Holy Cross is getting the holy @#$#$ beaten out of them. Time to call them the “Lusaders”.
— As for Evansville, everyone is getting even (and then some with them). Someone needs to show Howard how to get it done.
— Eric confuses Idaho State and Boise.
— The Kennesaw State Owls are so bad they’re making Judge Mountain Landis throw up on himself in the grave.
— Hey a lot has happened over longtime commish Kennesaw’s dead body (including integretion of the majors).. The judge was a real nice guy (“son, just do the best you can – to do those years”) (“Gentlemen, I’m due back in court in 5 minutes … let’s talk salary”)
— Bowie Kuhn, whose era was known for strikes. And he also had a great name.
— A recommendation for baseball’s survival…use free internet to get your product in front of people
— An interview you won’t want to miss with the Shah of Iran (giving important insights into the genesis of pervasive anti-West feelings of resentment in Iran and the dynamics of oil markets in the late 70s)
— ChabDog espouses new respect for the State College of New Jersey
— Under 20 degrees is not dog walking weather (sorry Bingo)
— A word about Leo .. the latest family dachshund … the foot long hot dog … and then some
— Who would you rather watch … PK “puke” Subban or “Bad Bunny”
— Team Giannis vs. Team Lebronis (we can hardly contain ourselves)
— The conversation rotates toward rotars
— Getting happily sidetracked with Bonnie and Clyde
NBA Update, Recap and Perspectives, Wednesday, 2-12-20:
https://www.facebook.com/ChabDog/
NBA Update:
- Don’t look now, but the Griz are making an earlier than expected push up to the playoffs this Feb…. with another very voluptuous, stat-packing night for Valanciunas. On the skimpier side of things, there’s Carmelo’s shocking shooting %, which wasn’t helped by tonight’s 1 for 15. TrailBlazers #Grizzlies
- No Giannis … no excuse for the Pacers not to hold on to their big lead, which they did (barely). #Bucks #Pacers
- For the first time in 16 opportunities, the Raptors finally fall flat in a trap game, getting ensnared by the needy Nets. #Raptors #Nets
Go long on the Short Rib plate at The Grindz … you’ll be rewarded handsomely for your modest investment
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Check it out at The Grindz @1601 (1601 PCH in Hermosa Beach); you be glad you made the trip.
NCAAM Update, Recap and Perspectives, Tuesday, 2-11-19:
https://www.facebook.com/ChabDog/
NCAAM Update:
- Spartans spring to life with some rough and tough stuff down low; meanwhile, a big disappointment for the Illini, who lose their star guard in addition to the game itself. #Spartans #FightingIllini
- Maryland survives after inexplicably going into a second half reverse at College Park. #Cornhuskers #Terrapins
- Important win for the wuff pack, as they scrap to stay above .500, and tournament eligible in the all-powerful ACC. #Wolfpack #Orange
On the “Don’t need another cup of Joe” CDST Show (Part 2):
— Falling into a pleasant time warp as we chug down the Rocky Horror Picture Show soundtrack (that Blowfeld certainly can dance, and how about that sweet transvestite from transsexual Transylvania)
— (I’m glad we caught you at home. Could we use your phone?)
— (So come up to the lab, and see what’s on the slab).
— Going over our collective accomplishments during hour 1, including a live plant inside the XFL game.
— Somehow ChabDog forgot about “The Vipers” from Tampa Bay
— Biden’s biding his time until South Carolina, but he just keeps sliding
— Eric, we agree there is nothing savory to recount about the Harvey trial … the intersextion of entertainment and law and order
— Hear Jack Lemon clear his sinuses in a very odd couple of ways HMMMAH, HMMAH, HMUHH, HMMAH
— Super Bowl memories …Well-read finds another excuse to mention Travis Henry, … then highlights Kansas City’s back-against-the-wall turnaround, San Fran’s benign neglect of the running game, and Mahomes uncanny ability to hone in on the essential connection.
— Male pattern baldness on bald display in the impeachment trial
— More anguishing (or languishing?) over the Irishman (some other scenes that just didn’t make sense)
— What was produced out of this year’s NBA trade deadline? Wiggins to GSW, Clippers get Morris, Pistons lose their security blanket in the big Drummond, and Iggy/Crowder are now crowing the South Beach bench.
— And none of us are willing to bet on Betts transforming the Doyyers
— Tank returns, briefly armed with a blue tooth and a fashion update from the game (hideous green helmets and jerseys with gargoyles)
— It’s only 10:30 am, but the TV is already being polluted by all this infernal Oscar hype
— We look in on The Ohio State taking on Wisconsin.
— ChabDog’s concise take on the oft-forgotten NHL
— SNL Cold Open, with some very shaky Susan Collins, that sneaky Mitch, and Jon Lovitz doing Dershowitz … wasn’t the sh-Devil the cute blonde from Happy Gilmore?
— Why Mr. Peanut went to Hell.
— Eric’s question about whether those XFL’ers wear socks goes unanswered
— Getting psyched up about Siakam (ChabDog explains)
— 7 legitimate non-dwarfs in the NBA West
— The scary truth about the human toll paid to corona virus (100X)
— We’re sure we won’t be anteater eaters.
— A classic Ferrie rant from JFK, then we off and running with, “Before they make me run” and reach our final final resting place with The Ballad of Billy the Kid.
On the “Don’t need another cup of Joe” CDST Show (Part 1):
On the “Don’t need another cup of Joe” CDST Show (Part 1):
— Who’ll stop the rain, or the high tide, at ChabDog Sports’ Newport Beach studios?
— It’s time for Spring, XFL.. the New York Guardians and the Tampa Bay Vipers; watch out for those Vipers (they were real tough in the Sopranos.. “We’re with the Vipers”) … and can’t wait to watch Josh “Tender” McGloin
— Turning on a night light for Coach Knight at Bloomington (the reconciliation was good to see) …. scoping out a cabinet position (Health and Human Services?)
— Tank celebrates the demise of the Iowa Dummocrat Caucus
— Was that woman who had buyer’s remorse after donning those “Pete” stickers a plant after all (this story sounds beyond belief)
— The untold story behind Butti’s beautiful showing (he won all those coin tosses at Bernie’s expense)
— What Warren really needs … some new shoes
— Reliving when Nancy did the Full Monty with Trumpster’s script
–ChabDog sticks up for Pelosi’s impeccable persona
— Why the 2020 election may be another Subway Series.
— But it doesn’t it in fact seem possible to pull yourself up by your own bootstraps (how about those Bloomberg terminals)
— Some political nicknames should be reserved for the trolls on the internet
— We open up the phone lines to college b-ball … yes it’s time
— Perhaps a last ditch push by previously compacted UCLA
— A quick run through the Big 10, and then it’s on to Bob’s 10 best soundbites (“You don’t have to bleep one single #@$#$ing word of this”/”I try to help you guys in this profession you’ve chosen … it’s one to two steps above prostitution”/”This is really good … see the blood drip out of it”/”When my time on earth is gone and my activities here are passed, I want they bury me upside down and my critics can kiss my ass”/”My entire adult life I have no conception of this term ‘game face'”)
— Wondering what it might be like to roll with “The Joel” (as in Joel Olsteen)
— Breaking down why the NHL is becoming an increasingly difficult sell (they aren’t being given good shelf space on ESPN)
— Nice jamming done by team GOP of those opposition party phone lines
— Going back to Silent Cal, who saw fit to sit on the sidelines and not participate in 1928, as we TR in 1908; reflecting on Cleveland’s dual wins, broken up by a loss to the immortal Benjamin Harrison
— ChabDog stands corrected … the man who ran against him in 1884 was one James G. Blaine (not Greeley)
— Where The Irishman fell flat (despite the Sohio sign)
— Trump’s noble crusade against nepotism … firing the Vindman Twins
— Up close and personal with Sneaky Little Mitch and Lindsay Vallerie Beaurreguard Matlock Graham
— And Trumpster walking into to testify using a Weinstein walker (priceless)
— Remembering the timeless Kirk Douglas (some choice clips and interviews), along with a little Rich Little (See Dick run.
See Jane run. See Dick and Jan and Spot and Puff run. See Dick catch up to Puff. See Dick grab Puff. See Dick smash Puff in the face)
NBA Update, Recap and Perspectives, Saturday, 2-8-20:
https://www.facebook.com/ChabDog/
NBA Update:
- GSW TAKES ITS FIRST SWIG OF THE WIG, AND DEFINITELY DIGS WHAT WENT DOWN… Warriors give the Lakers a run for their money for three quarters … but in the end get stiffed by five. #Lakers #Warriors
- Another example of why from night to night, you just don’t know what to expect in the NBA; high flying Clips get stripped of their manhood at the Target. Definitely a case of low T for Doc’s dudes against the T-wolves. #Clippers #Timberwolves
- How did this happen? Leonard leaves the Raptors, and they end up even better than they were last year. That’s undoubtedly overstating the case, but VanVleet is tearing it up, and Pascal has definitely surpassed himself from last year. With Lowry and Serge Protector, among others, it by no means clear that the Bucks will be able to clear their hurdle en route to the Finals. #Nets #Raptors
- Pistons get drubbed with Drummond. Meanwhile, Julius seems to have brought a winning attitude to the Knicks. #Knicks #Pistons
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