Because sports should never run your life ... retorts for sports

US Open Tuneup Circuit Update: Citi Open

Little Nicky may not be all grow’sed up, but he’s definitely one of the best swingers out there; today, he was all money, honey, as he pumped big ace after big ace down the throat of Daniil, he of the slightly stodgy wheels. Kyrgios continues to hone his craft in anticipation of a possible coming out party in early September, and his brash, in-your-face bravado may be a perfect fit for a NYC tennis community that has embraced the likes of Jimbo Connors, Johnny Mac and the man they call Nasty.

Recommendation — get a coach, a therapist and a trainer who can work on your posture and flexibility … the latter is probably contributing to the back issues.

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Saturday, 8-3-19:

MLB Update:

  • So if Boston wins 49 games in a row from here, it will match last year’s record of performance…. that right there gives you an idea of how far short this year’s bunch has fallen. Yankees throw the Sox in the dirty clothes hamper, with a double-dip decimation, that includes a battering of Sale and a habitual roughing up of the ever-vulnerable Matt Barnes. #RedSox #Yankees
  • Over-matched White Sox plead nolo contendere against Nola. #WhiteSox #Phillies
  • San Diego certainly wishes Buehler had taken the day off; instead, he became the next strikeout king of Los Angeles. #Padres #Dodgers
  • Tough luck for Archer, who gives the Bucs a quality start, and has has nothing to show for it after the Pirate pen fails yet again; Mets are showing too much pop these days for a team that most had written off well before the AS break. #Pirates #Mets
  • Cub pitching bails out the Northsiders once more, with Cole Hamels coming the DL and to the rescue; if his return can take pressure off the often underperforming offense, this team could be in the driver’s seat for the stretch run. #Brewers #Cubs
Categories: MLB

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Friday, 8-2-19:

MLB Update:

  • Mets’ HoJo certainly looked good in his HoJo colors
  • Joey finally gets some good wood on the ball, and the Reds use their good wood to stifle the home standing Braves. #Reds #Braves
  • Starling stars as Pirates finally put together a complete effort and take advantage of that old Met achilles heel … the leaky pen. #Mets #Pirates
  • Boston continues its slide, as Paxton recovers from first inning troubles and Torres tears into a Rodriguez offering for a fairly devastating grand slaw. #RedSox #Yankees
  • More killing time in the NL Central, as Milwaukee, Chicago and St. Louie are all milling around 1st.
  • Texas looks sexy … against Detroit (oh boy!)
  • Cleveland resumes it’s upward mobility by punishing Angels still full of angst … but to what end?
Categories: MLB

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Thursday, 8-1-19:

MLB Update:

  • Cole stole the show once again, and at 13-5 continues to occupy the role of H-town ace. #Astros #Indians
  • White Sox get sullied by the matriculating Mets, who are eyeing 2nd/3rd place in the NL East. Yes, it is within reach. #Mets #WhiteSox
  • Did the Reds lose all of their cojones when they bid adieu to pugilistic Puig? It certainly looked that way as the Braves made short work of them in today’s rain shortened game. #Reds #Braves
  • Squeamish Cubs look like scrubs at Busch, as they manage nothing more than one lonely hit against journeyman Jack. #Cubs #Cardinals
  • When is Dumbrowski’s Cashner experiment going to be abandoned? Maybe when people start calling him that on a regular basis…It certainly is looking like this ill-fated acquisition is not having the intended effect. #Rays #RedSox
Categories: MLB

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Wednesday, 7-31-19:

MLB Update:

  • Dare we mention Mets and wild card in the same breath? They’re getting great starting pitching and enough hitting to get the job done. If they can figure out a way to navigate the minefield that is their flimsy bullpen, watch out. #Mets#WhiteSox
  • He’s not the Cubs’ ace but the mound is definitely Hendricks’ place when it comes to facing off against the scuffling Cards. #Cubs #Cardinals
  • Cleveland continues to insist it’s for real, with a beat down of the complacent Astros, who appear to be resting on their laurels after attracting superstar Greinke. #Astros #Indians
  • Rays’ abuse of a poor Porcello raises more questions about Boston’s already suspect starting rotation. Boston’s not enjoying living life in Rick’s fastball lane. #Rays #RedSox
Categories: MLB

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Tuesday, 7-30-19:

MLB Update:

  • Reds go down in flames, led by their fighting frosted flake, Yasiel. #Reds #Pirates
  • Boston gives away a precious game with more weak kneed relief; unless this is fixed soon, it will ruin the Summer in New England. #Rays #RedSox
  • More musical chairs in the NLCentral, as the Cards mug the Cubs in muggy St. Louis. #Cubs #Cardinals
  • Syndergaard was sinfully good tonight! #Mets #WhiteSox
  • Nats were minus Mad Max tonight, and it certainly showed.#Braves#Nationals
  • O’s show massive moxie, rallying behind unlikely hero Chris Davis, who breaks out of his latest O-fer. #Orioles #Padres
Categories: MLB

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Monday, 7-29-19:

MLB Update:

  • Detroit’s timid Tigers get turned on by the big rocks just beyond center field in Anaheim, and decide to jump fence with a couple big homers from Miggy and Jordy. #Tigers #Angels
  • Amid all the misery that has been piled on their high altitude doorstep over the past month, the Rockies can take solace in the fact that they have in fact won 3 of 4 against the hated Dodgers. #Dodgers #Rockies
  • Nats are brazenly capitalizing on a growing reservoir of confidence; could this be the year that all those chunky monkeys get peeled off their backsides. Rendon is certainly doing his level best to make this happen. #Braves #Nationals
  • It would appear as though the terrible Pirates have officially thrown in the terrible towel. #Pirates #Reds
  • Yes, at 1-10, Baltimore’s Hess has a record that is now … well, a real mess. #Orioles #Padres
Categories: MLB

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Sunday, 7-28-19:

MLB Update:
  • Bizarre behavior from Bauer, who throws a Royal hissy fit after getting tossed, in addition to throwing the innocent baseball over the center field wall. Therapy would appear to be in order. #Indians #Royals
  • Powerful Twins go yard early and often against the sagging White Sox, and send Dylan abruptly back to his Covey hole in the dugout, while winning their first series after a protracted dry spell. #Twins #WhiteSox
  • Stros jump all over the Cardinals with Springer as the usual spark plug. Operating a bit under the radar, Houston how has the pole position for home field throughout the playoffs in the AL. #Astros #Cardinals
  • USS Strasburg keeps chugging along, taking down the dangerous Dodgers with little turbulence and is charting a course toward the Cy Young; memo to Washington — do not prematurely shut this guy down. #Dodgers #Nationals
  • Rockies lately don’t look to cocky, while the Reds have caught fire since catcher Tucker has assume duties behind, and at, the plate. #Rockies #Reds
  • Don’t tell the Mets they’re out of it, now that they’ve got 50 wins and a strong new starter in Stroman; as for the Pirates, time to build them a funeral pyre since the the Break. #Mets #Pirates
  • Rays somehow find a way against he surprisingly pesky Blue Jays, and in the process take back second place. #Rays #BlueJays
  • Boston gets bombed by the Bombers, with Sale getting taken into the deepest confines of Fenway by Romine. A prime opportunity to make this divisional race somewhat competitive is, for the moment lost. #Yankees #RedSox
Categories: MLB

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Friday, 7-26-19:


MLB Update:

  • St.Louis sneaks back into first, as Goldy impresses for the fifth straight game … this time against poor Pressly. #Astros #Cardinals
  • Cubs continue to get dragged back to the pack in the NL Central, done in tonight by tepid hitting; time again for Maddon to get mad and animated … electro-shock therapy seem warranted. #Cubs #Brewers
  • Wheeler trade feelers will undoubtedly be generating more interest after today’s impressive stint by fireballer Zach. #Mets #Pirates
  • Red Sox erupt for another double digit stick up of the shell shocked Yankees, who must be wondering when they ever will be able to relax; certainly not with non-starter, starters like Paxton. #Yankees #RedSox
  • Baltimore continues to go ballistic against the aghast Angels. With a lively ball and without much fanfare, Nunez and Mancini have nearly 50 taters. #Orioles #Angels
Categories: MLB

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Thursday, 7-25-19:

MLB Update:

  • Twins continue to be infused with energy through ignition of their Cruz fuse. #Twins #WhiteSox
  • Pitiable Pirates get ransacked once again at PNC by red hot Redbirds, who are quickly moving up in the NL pecking order. #Cardinals #Pirates
  • A serious malaise seems to have blown in from the Bay and is afflicting the A’s. #Rangers #Athletics
  • Boston may be playing from behind in the standings, but they certainly had a lot of fun tonight … tar and feathering Tanaka and his understudy Tarpley; the Yankees starting pitching has lately been a total joke, and the Red Sox are licking their chops for the remainder of this fracas at Fenway. #Yankees #RedSox
Categories: MLB

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Wednesday, 7-24-19:

MLB Update:

  • It was a long, long day for Lyles and the rest of Bucs’ staff, as they were defiled by DeJong’s long balls, among other indignities. #Cardinals #Pirates
  • Yankees take their series with Minnesota, making All-Star Odorizzi look remarkably below average. Twins had better shore up their rotation or they may find themselves rotated out of the post-season prematurely. #Yankees #Twins
  • Colorado’s trip to Washington now involves a double dip slip, as a cohesive group of Nationals continue to whip the competition. #Rockies #Nationals
  • Red Sox lose the game to Tampa Bay, lose their sweep but may be hiring a lawyer to argue their case on appeal. #RedSox #Rays
Categories: MLB

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Tuesday, 7-23-19:

MLB Update:

  • Walden mows down Meadows, and it’s one down, one to go for the level climbing, 2nd place Red Sox. #RedSox #Rays
  • Better late than never; A’s wake up from a deep slumber in the ninth and finally make some plays, enabling them to grab back some lost ground in the AL West race. #Athletics #Astros
  • Can the Cards please do Pirate fan a solid tomorrow and beat us by more than an eat-your-heart-out one run? Probably not … doing us favors just isn’t in the Redbird DNA. #Cardinals #Pirates
  • CO looked all Strassed out at the plate and to make matters worst got burned by the cycling of a terrific Turner. #Rockies #Nationals
Categories: MLB

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Monday, 7-22-19:

MLB Update:

  • Gott’s relief work hits the spot, while Strop’s appearance doesn’t stop anything. Giants stay on a roll, while Cubs continue to yo yo. #Giants #Cubs
  • Twins merrily imbibe plenty of delicious cc’s of CC, en route to a handful of homers that take down the bombers. #Yankees #Twins
  • JD and friends wear out the Rays, with balls echoing through a largely empty warehouse, and prompting Tampa Bay to raise (quite lamely) the white flag, by throwing a position player in the ninth (down by only five). No, this does not look like a playoff team. #RedSox #Rays
  • With Hader away, the Red Legs press the issue and cause quite a mess in Old Milwaukee against Jeffress. #Reds #Brewers
  • Another brutal bad beat at the hands of the Cardinal sinners. What else could the Pirates possibly expect? #Pirates #Cardinals
Categories: MLB

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Sunday, 7-21-19:

MLB Update:

  • Blackmon ends CO offensive blackout with a power surge from the plate, as the Rock’ em Sock’ em Rockies finally sock it to the Yankees. #Rockies #Yankees
  • Boston’s Cashner continues to crash and burn, while Baltimore’s Asher dusts off the Red Sox with surprising ease. The result is a very bad series loss for the defending World Champions. #RedSox #Orioles
  • Redbirds peck apart the Reds with a monster game from starter Munoz. #Cardinals #Reds
  • More misery for the Mets, who weaken yet again in the late innings; as for the Giants, they come back from the brink of extinction to level their record and ready for … a playoff run. #Mets #Giants
  • Red P’s wreck hospitality of yellow P’s with huge homer in extras by Hoskins. #Phillies #Pirates
  • To their credit, the Angels have not given up, and remain a long shot playoff pretender … going to three games over with a scorching of Seattle. #Angels #Mariners
Categories: MLB

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives, Saturday, 7-20-19:

MLB Update:

  • Give these A’s an A for resilience; they’re not going away, and look like they’ll getting a wild card invitation in the mail, come October. As for the Twins, life is getting a bit more complicated. #Athletics #Twins
  • Braves still can’t shake those annoying gNats; time for a self-help guide. #Nationals #Braves
  • Pirates capture 2nd game of latest Keystone conflict, making it look too easy with Musgrove’s 2-hit mound mastery of the phlegmatic Phillies. #Phillies #Pirates
  • Bosox survive a rather poor outing to Porcello by battering Baltimore’s baby seals over the head and with reckless abandon. For Red Sox fans, this game was indeed one fine mess. #RedSox #Orioles
  • Tampa’s bats are starting to resemble toothpicks; witness, today’s pipsqueak effort at the plate, which hardly made a discernible echo at BJ’s Warehouse in St. Pete. #WhiteSox #Rays
  • It’s deja vu all over again as Chicago pulls another 6-5 victory out of their cubby hats. #Padres #Cubs
  • Colorado’s falling out of the wildcard race almost as fast as their former governor HIckenlooper is getting kicked out of the Dem primary race. #Rockies #Yankees
Categories: MLB

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