Because sports should never run your life ... retorts for sports

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives: Sunday, 7-16 (click post for audio)

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MLB Update:

  • No longer a flame thrower, CC can still confuse opposing teams with his cute assortment of curves, cutters and sliders. #Yankees #RedSox
  • Homer time for Nationals against Homer Bailey, which caps off a great week for Washington in terms of shoring up their pen and providing some welcome relief. #Reds #Nationals
  • Colorado stomps on Steven Matz, getting an inside-the-park job from hustling Charlie Blackmon, as well Desmond’s departure from the DL. #Rockies #Mets
  • Pirates catch Cardinals at the wire, despite a magnificent game from Magneuris. #Pirates #Cardinals
  • Quintessential debut for Quintana, as Chicago’s little bears bash the Birds. #Cubs #Orioles
  • D-backs continue to disintegrate against strangely assertive Atlanta. #Braves #Diamondbacks
  • Phils offer up a scathing rebuke of Scahill in the sixth. #Phillies #Brewers

Categories: MLB

Wimbledon Update: the day before the Women’s final

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Wimbledon Update:

  • It’s easy to win, when your ship’s come in, and you think you’ve got the market beat, now that the field is missing the shifty Spaniard with pants too tight in the seat. Ah, but don’t forget that waiting in the wings is a guy who is a lot younger, who should be a lot hungrier, and since he doesn’t have his beard cream, is really itching for a Wimby title. Go Marin!
  • Fed says Bye Bye Berdy, which, sadly, means no more Queen Ester.
  • It will take a true Muguruzian effort to put down this year’s sentimental favorite, the often sour-faced sister of Serena … and that is exactly what Garbine the winning machine can supply.

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives (Lynyrd Skynyrd style): Saturday, 7-14 (click post for audio)

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MLB Update (Lynyrd Skynyrd style):

  • Ooh that smell, can’t ya smell that smell… it’s the stench coming from the mound at Camden Yards… them’s some pretty stinky meatballs being served up by Kevin “I just got hit into the causeway” Gausman. #Orioles #Cubs
  • Yee haw! JB’s huge hammer gives the Buccos the 3 runs they need to force the recalcitrant Redbirds 3 steps toward the door. #Pirates #Cardinals
  • Yanks let get away a valuable chance to rip the hearts out of the Red Sox…. you got that right… yeah you got that right. #RedSox #Yankees
  • I never dreamed that a stroke could be as dreamy as that of Charmin Robinson, the ultra smooth Cano. #Mariners #WhiteSox
  • Some serious down south jukin going on in Atlanta to jump start the 2nd half for the Braves. #Diamondbacks #Braves
  • Joey Gallo takes a break from his meeting with Cousin Vinny to send Texas’ Napoli an important text… don’t ask me, no more question… #Rangers #Royals
  • Pitiful Phils done in by a Brauny slam, a three run job by Orlando, and double double trouble from Santana. #Phillies #Brewers
  • Call me the breeze deGrom, he of the flowing locks, hopes he can push the dopey Mets up the NL East ladder.
  • Bryce, the man with one of the nicest swings in the NL, is someone the Nat fans simply love and understand. #Reds #Nationals
  • Dodgers very pweased to have a dialed in, competitive Puig of their own. #Dodgers #Marlins

Categories: MLB

Wimbledon Update: Manic and Womanic Monday (Day 7)

Wimbledon Update:

  • Head scratching loss for Nadal, who had thought he was the most Major terrorist of them all; sorry Rafa, today Muller was your ruler.
  • Paire blows another tire when he runs into the Scottish hangnail named Murray, and doesn’t have an adequate spare.
  • Fed puts Baby Fed to bed, without much drama.
  • Experience over curls, as Milos straightens out petulant, big boy Zverev.
  • Marin makes marinara out of Agut.
  • Tomas brings out his big gun to detonate Dominick.
  • Mugsyrutha KO’s Kerber.
  • Size doesn’t matter when half pint Halep is victor against Victoria.
  • Vandeweghe pushes the persistent pusher Wozniacki out of the picture.

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives: Sunday, 7-9 (click post for audio)

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MLB Update:

  • Turner turns on two, and Royal hitters have their wooden sticks literally sawed off by Kershaw. #Dodgers #Royals
  • St. Louis Cardinals pound Matz and leave a Cleveland Steamer under the Mets’ welcome mat at Citi Field. #Mets #Cardinals
  • Unassuming Rays remind Red Sox that while Kelly may throw fast, it his pitches don’t move enough, hitters like Brad Miller can still find their groove. #RedSox #Rays
  • Time to rotate the tires on the Yankees’ rotation, as this current mix just isn’t floating the boat in the Bronx. Meanwhile, Milwaukee continues to mill around in 1st place. #Brewers #Yankees
  • If the Astros are really this good, the rest of the league had better pray… just ask the Jays…#Astros #BlueJays
  • Pirates close out first half of season with exploding guns at Wrigley, led by chief Lester molester Francisco Cervelli. #Cubs #Pirates

Categories: MLB

Stop by the The Grindz @ 1601 …

and try the delicious Tofu Stir Fry….

Your taste buds and your waistline will thank you.  Enjoy a healthy eating experience with organic firm tofu, cabbage, bell peppers, broccoli and onions, sauteed in extra virgin olive oil, and served with sides of rice, mac salad and ramen cabbage salad.  Be sure to ask for teriyaki sauce, which makes a perfect dressing for the tofu.

 

Wimbledon Update: Women’s Singles (Day 6)

Wimbledon Update:

  • Garbine empties some cartridges against Sorana.
  • Martic throws Diyas from the dais.
  • As usual, Wozniacki outworks her opponent.
  • Kerber survives a scare from Ms. Rogers.
  • Magdalena looks magnificant against Lesya.
  • Agnie has the time of her life against Timea.

Wimbledon Update: Men’s Singles (Day 6)

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Wimbledon Update:

  • Djoker gobbles up Gulbis, and in the process forces a focus pill down the throat of Mr. Chair Umpire.
  • Roger makes mincemeat out of Mischa.
  • Querrey questions those who say an American man doesn’t belong in the 4th round.
  • Thiem continues to play like a dream.
  • Berdych takes out David Ferrer and his slingshot, turning the Spanish bulldog into a terrified terrier.
  • Zverev goes off on Ofner.
  • According to most experts, the wrong French Mannarino won today when Gael met Adrian.
  • It may be impossible to build a more Wimbledon winning machine than the towering Raonic man.

MLB Update, Recap and Perspectives: Saturday, 7-8 (click post for audio)

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MLB Update:

  • Beating fake Jake just ain’t what it used to be, but tonight’s push back win by the Buccos was a huge booster shot for the Burghers. #Pirates #Cubs
  • A very tough loss today for poor fellow Porcello. #RedSox #Rays
  • Wheeler’s 3-6, and have the wheels officially come off the Mets’ bandwagon?
  • Brave affront put up by heretofore invisible Atlanta, as Braves keep their deficit in NL East to single digits. #Nationals #Braves
  • Orioles get some pitching, and leave Twin batters bitching. #Twins #Orioles

Categories: MLB

Wimbledon Update: Women’s Singles (Day 5)

 

Wimbledon Update:

  • Konta is as vicious as Cujo and joins Konjuh in the 4th round.
  • Venus drops the big one on Osaka.
  • Halep peppers her shots just enough to make Peng Shui really uncomfortable.
  • Big Vicky ruins the tea party when beats back favorite daughter Heather Watson.
  • Elina over Carina.
  • Garcia brings it against Brengle.

Wimbledon Update: Men’s Singles (Day 5)

Wimbledon Update:

  • Muller continues his historic makeover.  Bruno would be proud.
  • Nadal takes off his khakis, puts on his tight-fitting shorts, and puts Khackanov in a straight jacket.
  • Anderson pummels Bemelmans.
  • Nish loses the wishbone pull to yet another spunky Spaniard.
  • Cilic forgets to shave, but still gives a tennis clinique to poor Steve Johnson.
  • Paire his many more than a pair of aces in jousting with, and ousting, Jerzy Boy.

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