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News Feed
- After an unfortunate trip to the M&T doctor’s office, it’s clear what the Steelers need … A TOMLIN-ECTOMY!
- If Harbaugh wasn’t seen limping out of Houston sans a broken clipboard, he should have been. Maybe it’s about time we say the Anger Mis-management side of jovial Jim.
- Jayden Daniels was simply relentless, and the Commanders just had too much staying power for the physically and emotionally exhausted Bucs. In another almost unbelievable twist of fate, this game took a couple of fateful turns for the worse for the home team when stone-hands Mayfield mishandled a couple of routine snaps. With that, the wildly erratic season for Tampa finally… abated.
- Eagles manufacture a thorough, if not brutally blunt, undressing of the Packers in cold Philly. Yeah, this result was no doubt painful due to the weather, but it was time through cold water on a season that really seemed to go fatally south a few weeks earlier in Minnesota.
- Major home improvement this week for the Bills, as Josh Allen takes the Broncos very figuratively by the horns and pins them to the turf, without mercy. Ravens beware….
In a few hours, it’s gonna be the start of Wild Card Weekend, and things’ll be getting hot and heavy in the NFL Playoffs. Who’s about to become extinct and who’s putting their feet down with maximum authority…. we’ll banter the subject, and plenty more, on the “The Other Cleat Just Spiked Your Meat” CDST Show. Is Mike Tomlin about to take that Steeler 4-wheeler carreening down Lookout Mountain for another sadistic spill? Can Sam Darnold get the hawk tuah girl off his mind, long enough for the Vikings to stage a real fun desert funeral for the sacrificial Rams. We ponder this and other questions that have been left curiously unanswered for far too long…. like how our own Abe Miranda conquered Barb-fire in the spread pool, and why Karen “Big Mouth” Bass had so little to say at her recent press conference. And time permitting, there’s the college football BS (sorry BCS) finale to consider; ChabDog hasn’t checked, but perhaps making Notre Dame a 5 point dog (is that right?) is just what the joint doctor ordered in South Bend.
Thanks to a thrilling turn of events in the 2nd half, we’ll be hearing more from the Notre Dame Victory March in January! Terrific win for the never-say-die Fighting Irish, who kept on fighting and out-slugged a very game squad from Penn St. Ara is certaining looking down from Heaven and smiling as the Freeman era has officially begun.
HE’S LARGER THAN LIFE. HE’S THE KARMAC OF THE LAUGH TRACK.
HE’S HONESTLY OUT THERE FOR YOU, FINDING THE WEAK LINK IN EVERY SPREAD.
HE’S THE CHABDOG SPORTS TALK NFL SPREAD SETTING CHAMPION FOR 2024,
COMING IN AT AROUND 60%+ AND ABLE LEAP FROG THE MIGHTY DOROTHY D
IN A SINGLE BOUND.
HE’S POUND FOR POUND THE SUPER HEAVYWEIGHT OF ALL LINE LAYERS.
HE’S ABE PAGODA MIRANDA, AND HE’S OUR NO. 1 FOR THE 2ND TIME IN FOUR YEARS.
One of these two (or maybe both) won the 2024 CDST Spread-besting competition. You both beat the stuffing outta me, so I am not worthy, …. can only seek to follow humbly in your footsteps…. stay tuned for our corporate secretary Well-read’s breakdown of how it ultimately played out. All I know if I achieved my objective of beating last year’s performance in terms of the numbies and staying outta the dreaded whine cellar.
ChabDog’s Takeaways from Week 18:
— Bryce Young is getting older, and that could be a scary development next year based on what we saw today.
— Steelers still have no clue about how to unglue their stuck-in-the-mud offense; Arthur Treacher Smith needs a teacher.
— What goes around, comes around Green Bay, … you played with fire today against Chicago, got burned, and now and you’re in no shape right now to take down filthy good Philadelphia.
— Rocky Mountain redemption today for Denver today against KC’s 3rd stringers (exactly who were those slim jims on the Chiefs’ d-line?); enjoy it now, because you are gonna get your doors blown off in blustery Buffalo.
— Speaking of The Doors, the Chargers are plugged in and playing power surge football like few others (my bad for douting they could cover today against the frayed Raiders); throw a radio in the Houston whirlpool, because the Texans are in for a big beat down at home next Saturday. Harbaugh’s soft driven and slow mad like some new language!
— Watching Baker shake ‘n bake and scramble for those hearty, heartfelt first downs was beautiful. This team has been through the MASH ward and has come out the other side… stronger. Gotta say the Commanders SHOULD NOT be favored when they make their foray into Tampa Bay.
— Samsonite travels well, but sorry Minnesota but the same can’t be said for Sam, who’ll be a sacrificial norseman come gametime against the Rams.
— Kudos to the Bungles for a good try, but you can never fully repent in Cin City for starting out 4-8. Where’s the beef? It’s not with Joe Cool and his cadre of nifty, shifty flankers; no it’s with the flimsy foundation you guys sport in the trenches.
Hey everyone and welcome to NFL Week 18 where I try to beat the spread every week, make a little money, or brag to my work besties that I simply pick winners cause our state doesn’t allow sports betting yet (fuck you California). At the moment, I’m leading everyone at ChabDog Sports Talk & hope to claim victory for my second time with Chabdog. However, this time I’m neck and neck with Dorothy Dawn who’s always leading the pack here since she, her friends, her fiance, and her bookie are all fanatical sports fans who eat, live, breathe, and shit sports all day. I want to go to one of her parties with all her sports friends and know that I’ve beaten my co-host at least once which means that I should be able to keep up with everyone else at the party if they come at me with anything sports related…lol. Regardless of who wins, I at least know I have a 58% + ability to pick winning football games against the spread, which in itself is an accomplishment. So take a look below…let me know in the comments section if I fucked this up or on any of my social media handles….let’s fucking gooooooooo.
@chabdogsports Only one week left! https://t.co/VSwI1vfXgB
— Well Read Producer ChabDog.com (@NewportBest_) December 31, 2024
𝚆𝚎𝚎𝚔 𝟷𝟾 #NFL – – – – – – – – – – – – 𝚁𝚊𝚟𝚎𝚗𝚜 -𝟷𝟽.𝟻 𝙱𝚎𝚗𝚐𝚊𝚕𝚜 -𝟸.𝟻 https://t.co/IwUxhK8vyB pic.twitter.com/GAnbLL2619
— Abe Miranda (@gawdbrudder) January 4, 2025
| | @gawdbrudder
Here we are at Week 18 and there is no more time for me to improve my dreadful picks record for this season. Mathematically, it is still possible to get back to .500, but that will require an incredible heater, and heaters are difficult when a lot of teams aren’t trying to win this week. Not only that, but the motivations for these teams are fluid and the NFL is too stupid to play all these games at the same time like a proper league would. For example, the five seed in the AFC is valuable because that team gets to travel to feeble Houston in the Wild Card Round instead of Baltimore or Buffalo. If Pittsburgh wins on Saturday, it takes the Chargers out of the running for that spot and they could lay down for the suddenly surging Raiders.
I’ll be taking the Steelers since they are home underdogs (even though that didn’t work last week) and the Chargers with the hope that they are motivated to stomp Las Vegas. The Ravens are now favored by an unheard of 20 points vs. Cleveland because they are playing for the AFC North title, so I’ll get out of their way and lay those points. Washington has clinched a Playoff spot, but there is plenty of reason to win at Dallas because a loss might force the Commies play at Philadelphia in the Wild Card Round instead of at Los Angeles against a Rams offense that has been held under 20 points in three straight games. That same motivation is in play for the Packers, who need a win and a Washington loss to avoid Philly. Speaking the Eagles, they have chosen against embarrassing the Giants by having Saquon Barkley rest instead of shattering the single-season rushing record against them. That gives me hope that Big Blue can end the season with a second straight win. Hopefully there will still be someone talented to select when our first round draft pick finally comes around.
Buffalo is also laying points while resting starters, but I trust Mitch Trubisky enough to give it the nod against New England. Denver is a massive favorite over Kansas City in a must-win game for the Broncos. I think they get the job done, but Carson Wentz playing spoiler would be hilarious, so give me the points in that one. In the great Sunday Night Football game, I like the Lions despite their defensive issues. They might be scarier on offense with Jahmyr Gibbs taking on a heavier workload due to David Montgomery’s injury.
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- Someone served up a ton of chewy charred duck at today’s Rose Bowl, … and it wasn’t during the tailgate portion. Sorry Phil, but there’s no more O left in the loss column for OU.
- The many twists and turns of this playoff game made it a real peach. Texas got too passive with a lead that wasn’t massive, but in the end shows it was long on character, when it refused to be scared off by the incredibly resilient Skattebo. Who knew there would be this much fight in ASU. But in the end, the big dog that was the Longhorns of course had to eat, sending the Sun Devils to defeat.
And in tonight’s Monday Nite Food Fight…..
Well Read’s Posts
Abe’s Posts
Week 11: Abe’s Scrumdidilyumptious NFL Picks (ATS)
Hey everyone & welcome back to my kick-ass blog where I make 50% + accurate picks Against The Spread (ATS)! Rolling into Week 11 with a 58% SZN winning percentage (ATS) and tied for first place among my co-hosts at ChabDog Sports (see below)!
Results to the end of Week 10: gameswins to playedweek 10% ChabDog 151 82 54% Well Read 151 78 52% Abe 151 87 58% Dorothy D 151 87…
— Well Read Producer ChabDog.com (@NewportBest_) November 12, 2024
You damn right I have to brag about this every week! These are hardcore football people and it’s an absolute honor to be able to keep up with them…especially Dorothy Dawn who lives, eats, and shits football all day along with every single person she hangs out with in her life..including her dad, “Packers Bob”, who’s been on our show multiple times and attended the Ice Bowl at Lambeau Field in 1967. So being tied with Dorothy and her army is incredible since all my time is focused on my full-time job, my social media content game, and clearing out my bedroom to make room for a gaming studio for future Twitch streams. So yeah, fuck all of you I’m winning and taking names…LMAO!!! Anyways…..before considering my Week 11 Scrumdidilyumptious ATS Picks, here is my SZN resume for your review.
Resume:
WEEK 1: 10/16 (62.5%) WEEK 2: 8/15 + 1 Push (53.3%) WEEK 3: 8/16 (50%) WEEK 4: 9/16 (56%) WEEK 5: 7/14 (50%) WEEK 6: 10/14 (71%) WEEK 7: 9/15 (60%) WEEK 8: 10/16 (63%) WEEK 9: 9/15 (60%) WEEK 10: 7/14 (50%) SEASON RECORD (ATS): 87/151 + 1 Push (58%)
OK, now that we’re all caught up and you’re still willing to read my scumbag-ass picks, let’s fucking go NFL Week 11 (thank you for acknowledging I’m one of theeeeee best at ChabDog Sports to do it this SZN)!
THURSDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL:
I texted our producer and told him I was taking the chalk (favored team) and going with the Eagles (-3.5). My Thursday Night Football chalk picks have been extremely shitty the last couple of weeks so this made me a little hesitant to pick the Eagles. Still, you got to look at every game as a new situation and felt that the Eagles had enough offensive weapons to beat the Commanders and I wasn’t wrong since the Eagles beat them by 8 points. So I’m already 1/1 for Week 11 along with our producer who also picked them.
| | @gawdbrudder
Week 10: Abe’s Scrumdidilyumptious NFL Picks (ATS)
Hey everyone & welcome back to the start of the 3rd Quarter of the regular NFL SZN! Rolling into this bitch with a 58% winning percentage (ATS) and tied for first place among my co-hosts at ChabDog Sports!
@chabdogsports Results to week 9: Player games pl tot wns % ChabDog 137 77 56% Well Read 137 69 50% Abe 137 80 58% Dorothy D 137 80 58%…
— Well Read Producer ChabDog.com (@NewportBest_) November 5, 2024
You damn right I have to brag about this! These are hardcore football people and it’s an absolute honor to be able to keep up with them…especially Dorothy who lives, eats, and shits football all day along with every single person she hangs out with in her life..including her dad, “Packers Bob”. So being tied with Dorothy and her army is incredible since all my time is focused on my full-time job, my social media content game, and figuring out my gaming studio cave situation. So yeah, fuck all of you I’m winning…LMAO!!! Anyway…..before considering my Week 10 Scrumdidilyumptious ATS Picks, here is my SZN resume for your review.
Resume:
WEEK 1: 10/16 (62.5%) WEEK 2: 8/15 + 1 Push (53.3%) WEEK 3: 8/16 (50%) WEEK 4: 9/16 (56%) WEEK 5: 7/14 (50%) WEEK 6: 10/14 (71%) WEEK 7: 9/15 (60%) WEEK 8: 10/16 (63%) WEEK 9: 9/15 (60%) SEASON RECORD (ATS): 80/137 + 1 Push (58%)
OK, now that we’re all caught up and you’re still willing to read my scumbag-ass picks, let’s fucking go NFL Week 10 (thank you for acknowledging I’m one of theeeeee best at ChabDog Sports to do it this season)!
THURSDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL:
I looked at the spread & decided to take “the chalk” (Baltimore -6.5) only to eat shit again. Of course, the Ravens had to play some weird AF football but were able to win by a single point instead of 6.5 points. The Bengals kept it interesting but dropped the ball when it mattered the most…a tough loss for Bengals fans.
| | @gawdbrudder
Dorothy’s Posts
Aaron’s Posts
Aaron’s Week 5 NFL Picks
Thanks to last week’s brilliant 10-6 performance, I am 31-32-1, and that is a .500 record if you include the Atlanta win already in the books for this week. It took a while, but we finally climbed out of that Week 1 hole. Next stop, profitability?!
Tampa Bay at Atlanta -2.5
I booked it with Well Read before the game on Thursday, so it is going down as a win! Thanks go out to Captain Kirko and my fantasy darling Drake London!
NY Jets vs. Minnesota -2.5
Finally, the Vikings are favored, but this game isn’t in Minnesota; it is in London. The Jets looked legit when they stomped New England, but then they went right back into pretender mode with an ugly home loss to Denver. I will keep riding these Vikings!
Carolina +4.5 at Chicago
The Panthers came back down to Earth last week with a loss vs. Cincinnati, but the Carolina offense continued to look legit with Andy Dalton under center. That will help the Panthers defeat Chicago outright on Sunday!
Baltimore at Cincinnati +2.5
Speaking of offense, the Bengals have scored 72 points over their last two games. They might only need one or two stops on defense to beat Baltimore.
Aaron’s Week 4 NFL Picks
Wow! It’s already Week 4! We should have all of these NFL teams figured out by now, right? I agree that I should have them figured out, but I have not yet obtained the level of sharpness to do just that. It has bee nice to hover around .500 for the last two weeks after a disastrous Week 1, but that still means we’re down overall. Time to start the comeback!
Dallas at NY Giants +6.5
Picking the Giants finally paid off against Cleveland, so why should I stop now? The Cowboys can’t run the ball, and that will allow the Big Blue pass rush to beat down Dak Prescott. It is a little sad how excited I am to see Daniel Jones’ face on the “Just checking in to see if y’all still dem Boys” meme.
Saints at Falcons -2.5
Atlanta might have had the toughest starting schedule in the entire NFL, so even though 1-2 isn’t great, the Falcons still have plenty of chances to improve their record. That starts against the rival Saints, who were finally slowed down by the Eagles last week.
LA Rams +3.0 at Bears
Did the Rams’ comeback against the 49ers just not happen? Sure, they still have a lot of injuries, but Caleb Williams is still very prone to mistakes with two interceptions in each of his last two games. This should at least be a pick ’em. It feels like we are stepping into a trap, but I will take my chances with the advantage at head coach and quarterback.
Minnesota +2.5 at Green Bay
Just keep riding the Vikings. That is the directive here. Yes, Green Bay has been very impressive with a close loss to Philadelphia followed by two wins with Malik Willis under center. I’m just going to keep riding this Viking ship as long as it is an underdog.
Steelers -1.5 at Colts
The Colts beat the Bears last week, but I am off of them until Anthony Richardson shows improvement. He is completing less than half of his passes on the season and not rushing enough to make up for it. The Steelers’ defense will eat him for lunch.
Denver +7.5 at NY Jets
I’m not taking Denver’s big win at Tampa Bay super seriously just yet, but both of the Broncos’ losses came by a touchdown, so I’ll ride with them here.
Philadelphia at Tampa Bay +2.5
I am hoping the Bucs bounce back after their bizarre loss to Denver at home. They did blow out Philly in the Playoffs last season.
Cincinnati -5.5 at Carolina
It’s the Andy Dalton revenge game! But Joe Burrow and the Bengals need it much more and their offense was pretty great in the loss to Washington. They should score enough to cover this as long as the Red Rifle doesn’t play like an MVP again.
Jacksonville at Houston -6.5
Both of these teams were embarrassed last week. At least the Texans have played good football at some point this season.
Washington +3.5 at Arizona
I keep going back and forth on whether Arizona is good or not. Jayden Daniels is showing great poise for a rookie, though. He should keep this game close even if Washington’s horrible defense keeps bleeding points.
New England at San Francisco -10.5
The 49ers need to destroy someone to reestablish dominance. Last week was a disaster for them, and they can’t even use injuries as an excuse since Jauan Jennings was so good.
Cleveland at Las Vegas -2.0
This is so gross. The Browns are horrible, and the Raiders just laid an egg at home to Carolina. I don’t think Cleveland can score on anyone, though.
Kansas City at LA Chargers +7.5
I don’t know why this line is so high. I am sticking with Jim Harbaugh after the setback last week. He knows how to pound the ball and keep possession away from Patrick Mahomes, but it might not even matter with how mid he has been the last two weeks.
Buffalo +2.5 at Baltimore
The Buffalo offense is better without Stefon Diggs. It has scored over 30 points in all three games and we will keep riding it and circling the wagons.
Tennessee at Miami -1.5
Miami needs to win this one after being shocked by the Titans last year in a game that cost the Dolphins a division title. Plus, Miami has a chance to stay relevant in the hunt for the Playoffs with upcoming games at New England and Indianapolis. I’m hoping Mike McDaniel can figure out how to win one without Tua Tagovailoa.
Seattle at Detroit -3.5
The Seahawks are 3-0, but they have played feeble competition. I’ll lay the points with the Lions.
Aaron’s Week 3 NFL Picks
It’s always difficult to pick games in Week 1, but I had a nice bounce-back performance in Week 2. Now it is time for the rubber match. Do I know ball or not? I am banking on some surprising teams continuing to surprise and I will be betting on those teams until the oddsmakers catch up or until they turn into pumpkins. Whichever happens first.
New England +6.5 at NY Jets
New England is the first of the surprise teams I am talking about. They have covered the spread twice in a row and have beaten Cincinnati outright. The Jets need this game badly, but they will have to grind it out because Aaron Rodgers has yet to throw for 200 yards in a game for them.
NY Giants +6.5 at Cleveland
Congrats to Cleveland for bouncing back from that Week 1 disaster and beating Jacksonville. The Browns should still have to score 20 points in a game before they are favored to beat anyone by a touchdown. Remember, my Giants were not abysmal last week. Malik Nabers is the real deal, and now we have a kicker who can help us cover this spread! I bet we can even win if we keep the opponent out of the end zone again (sigh).
Chicago at Indianapolis -1.5
The Colts laid an egg last week, but they should still be laying at least a field goal against the Bears. Chicago’s defense won the game against Tennessee and kept the game in Houston close, but I think it is asking a lot for this team to win outright on the road.
Houston at Minnesota +4.5
The oddsmakers still don’t believe in Minnesota! I do, especially after Houston failed to put away Chicago last week until the final minute.
Aaron’s Week 2 NFL Picks
Week 1 of the NFL is finally in the books and the veil of the unknown has been lifted, but now we have a new conundrum. Of what we saw unfold last week, what is real and what is a mirage? What is a fluke and what is a season-long trend? Hey, this is almost as hard to predict as Week 1. At least I won’t be quite as disappointed with the Giants when they play like garbage.
Buffalo at Miami -2.5
Both of these teams had a little more trouble with their first opponents than I thought they would. At least I had Arizona covering against Buffalo, but I thought it would be more of a backdoor cover than a legitimately close game. Miami, meanwhile, was a yard away from falling behind Jacksonville 24-7 before it was saved by a Travis Etienne goal-line fumble and an 80-yard touchdown strike from Tua Tagovailoa to Tyreek Hill. Now many fans are wondering why the Dolphins are favored in a night game when the South Florida humidity won’t have as much of an effect. I’ll tell you why. This team is much better than it looked in Week 1! Miami gets a big win tonight!
Las Vegas +8.5 at Baltimore
Neither of these teams were impressive last week, but the Ravens came an inch away from almost beating the Chiefs when Isaiah Likely caught a last-second touchdown only to be ruled out of bounds by replay. It’s easy to remember that late surge by Baltimore and a little less easy to remember that it looked like the inferior team for much of the evening. Inferior to the Chiefs is nothing to panic about, but I think this number is a little too big against what I expect to be a spunky Raiders squad. Antonio Pierce’s super conservative 4th down decisions were a detriment last week, but they might help cover in a game like this one.
LA Chargers -6.0 at Carolina
Jim Harbaugh took care of business for me against the aforementioned Raiders last week, so let’s keep rolling with him. I sure as heck am not backing the Panthers for the second week in a row, so if they bounce back and play respectable football, I will tip my cap.
Aaron’s Week 1 NFL Picks
Football is back! So what if it’s already been back for more than a week thanks to college football? It’s REALLY back tonight with the start of the NFL, tiny point spreads, and fantasy! I am a New York Giants fan, so I am predicting a season full of pain and suffering, but maybe some of you out there can get some joy out of the next five months. There’s always fantasy football, right? Nope, just more frustration and torture. But how about the ChabDog picks contest? Now, there is something that I have a chance to win.
Baltimore +2.5 at Kansas City
Everyone is going to love the Chiefs at less than a field goal. They just won the freaking Super Bowl and are at home in front of a raucous crowd. Plus, ChiefsAholic just got sentenced to federal prison, so you know the boys will be extra fired up to get the job done for him. HOWEVER, the Chiefs aren’t the elite offensive team they used to be. Last winter, they barely got by Baltimore in the Playoffs thanks to a great defensive effort. Patrick Mahomes is still looking for a go-to wide receiver and Travis Kelce might be over the hill. The defense is still good, but it’s tougher to repeat a great defensive season than a great offensive season. Give me the hungry Ravens with their new-look and more intimidating running game for the upset!
Green Bay +1.5 vs. Philadelphia
It is a sham that this game is even happening with the crime activity in Sao Paulo being so high that players are leaving their families behind. Player safety is a priority for the NFL until the owners can make a few extra bucks by putting a game in South America! Plus, it is a Peacock exclusive game, so even fans in America will feel like they are getting robbed. Anyway, this is an easy one for me. The Eagles were in full meltdown mode at the end of last season. Now, many fans are convinced that Saquon Barkley and a couple of new coordinators will solve all their issues. I’m not so sure. I’ll take the rising Packers after their exciting run in last season’s Playoffs.
Pittsburgh at Atlanta -2.5
This spread should be more than three points. Maybe not everyone realizes how much better the Atlanta offense is now that the team has a veteran quarterback under center. Kirk Cousins is coming back from a major Achilles tendon injury, but he won’t need to move around much when Bijan Robinson and Drake London are entering their primes. This offense is just as talented as the one that Cousins left behind in Minnesota. It will be tough for the Steelers and their new quarterback to keep pace, even with new offensive coordinator Arthur Smith’s familiarity with Atlanta.
Arizona +7.5 at Buffalo
Arizona’s offense is on the rise due to the selections of Marvin Harrison Jr. and Trey Benson in the NFL Draft. Plus, Trey McBride emerged as a star tight end last season, and Kyler Murray is expected to have his best season yet after missing half of 2023 due to recovery from knee surgery. Does that mean that the Cardinals will stun Buffalo in Week 1? There’s a chance with Josh Allen breaking in a new-look receiving group. I still think Buffalo prevails, but I wouldn’t pick the Bills in survivor. Taking the points is the move here.