On the “Don’t need another cup of Joe” CDST Show (Part 1):
— Who’ll stop the rain, or the high tide, at ChabDog Sports’ Newport Beach studios?
— It’s time for Spring, XFL.. the New York Guardians and the Tampa Bay Vipers; watch out for those Vipers (they were real tough in the Sopranos.. “We’re with the Vipers”) … and can’t wait to watch Josh “Tender” McGloin
— Turning on a night light for Coach Knight at Bloomington (the reconciliation was good to see) …. scoping out a cabinet position (Health and Human Services?)
— Tank celebrates the demise of the Iowa Dummocrat Caucus
— Was that woman who had buyer’s remorse after donning those “Pete” stickers a plant after all (this story sounds beyond belief)
— The untold story behind Butti’s beautiful showing (he won all those coin tosses at Bernie’s expense)
— What Warren really needs … some new shoes
— Reliving when Nancy did the Full Monty with Trumpster’s script
–ChabDog sticks up for Pelosi’s impeccable persona
— Why the 2020 election may be another Subway Series.
— But it doesn’t it in fact seem possible to pull yourself up by your own bootstraps (how about those Bloomberg terminals)
— Some political nicknames should be reserved for the trolls on the internet
— We open up the phone lines to college b-ball … yes it’s time
— Perhaps a last ditch push by previously compacted UCLA
— A quick run through the Big 10, and then it’s on to Bob’s 10 best soundbites (“You don’t have to bleep one single #@$#$ing word of this”/”I try to help you guys in this profession you’ve chosen … it’s one to two steps above prostitution”/”This is really good … see the blood drip out of it”/”When my time on earth is gone and my activities here are passed, I want they bury me upside down and my critics can kiss my ass”/”My entire adult life I have no conception of this term ‘game face'”)
— Wondering what it might be like to roll with “The Joel” (as in Joel Olsteen)
— Breaking down why the NHL is becoming an increasingly difficult sell (they aren’t being given good shelf space on ESPN)
— Nice jamming done by team GOP of those opposition party phone lines
— Going back to Silent Cal, who saw fit to sit on the sidelines and not participate in 1928, as we TR in 1908; reflecting on Cleveland’s dual wins, broken up by a loss to the immortal Benjamin Harrison
— ChabDog stands corrected … the man who ran against him in 1884 was one James G. Blaine (not Greeley)
— Where The Irishman fell flat (despite the Sohio sign)
— Trump’s noble crusade against nepotism … firing the Vindman Twins
— Up close and personal with Sneaky Little Mitch and Lindsay Vallerie Beaurreguard Matlock Graham
— And Trumpster walking into to testify using a Weinstein walker (priceless)
— Remembering the timeless Kirk Douglas (some choice clips and interviews), along with a little Rich Little (See Dick run.
See Jane run. See Dick and Jan and Spot and Puff run. See Dick catch up to Puff. See Dick grab Puff. See Dick smash Puff in the face)
On the “Who Will Come Out On Tops” CDST Show (Part 2):
— A monologue from Woody that you won’t soon forget (I turned 40 … I’m balding slightly on top … the balding viral type … (like John Roberts and Trump’s lawyer “Baloney Cipollone”) … the universe is expanding … shades of Greta worried about global warming … the universe will be expanding for billions of years Alvy)
— “Let’s turn out the lights and play hide the salam” …”If I have grass or alcohol, I get unbearably wonderful” … Woody breaks out the red light bulb for some Old New Orleans essence …If I get a laugh from a person who is high, it doesn’t count because they’re always laughing
— What is so fascinating about a bunch of pituitary cases trying to stuff a basketball through a hoop?
— Why is that anti-Weinerstein movement called “Me Too” … do more people want to be victims of horrible Harvey or abhorrent Anthony?
— Need to pick your Secretary of Education? Find me a 10 yr old.
— Memories of Howeird Dean … “We’re on to New Hampshire”
— Post-partum Super Bowl Blues (what on earth is a couch potato to do?)
— Well-read worries that women refs will be calling up penalties from two years ago (no comment)
— ChabDog wonders why can’t we just openly embrace those particular problems endemic to both sexes/what’s the hang up with men going for those little enhancers … let’s hear it for supplements, like the ones being pushed by the Big Hurt … “And she’ll like it too”
— Meanwhile in the world of sports… unrepentant, tight-lipped Houston refuses to admit it did anything wrong… Could the Astros possibly be bigger asses if they tried?
— Mookie to the Dodgers for a starting pitcher and a fortune cookie (Buehler? Buehler?) … and throw in Chris Taylor for good tape measure
— Sorry that Phil Rizzo died at age 90 … but we’re relieved Rizzuto is still alive and kicking
— The Grandyman can … a B+ player who new how to reach those grandstands (not HOF numbers, but perhaps good enough for Mets or Tigers honors)
— Brady needs a National Lampoon Vegas Vacation
— Why can’t cursing Djokovic be as composed on the court as Dvorak?
— Analyzing the current class of NFL inductees … we can think of a number of guys who should have edged our Edgerin
— Find out everything you wanted to know about Duke Slater
— A certain Hall of Fame name “Emerson Boozer” … way better than Mack Speedy or Ed Sprinkle
— Subpoenas from the McClellan Committee… no problemo for Nicholson’s Hoffa as he confronts Bobby Kennedy at the DOJ offices (“I don’t know what you’re trying to prove, but you’re proving it” “You don’t impress me and your office don’t impress me … bunch of rum runners”… “@#$@#$@# your brother”)
— John Candy as a crooked lawyer in JFK (“truth is I never met the dude … all I know is sometimes he sends me some cases”)
— And it’s Maahk Caruso to the rescue
— More on why Ben R. doesn’t get the benefit of the doubt from Patriot patrons
— Doesn’t Andy Reid of the Chefs remind you of the chef on the Burger Chef logo? But who’s Jeff?
— Someone prematurely stakes a claim for the Niners
— A prop bet that there won’t be any Corona Beer commercials during the game (Tony Romo is crestfallen)
— Someone was drinking the major Haterade today
— Our cantakerous cabbie declares open war on uber drivers … especially ones from Morocco
— A demographic survey of douche bags in East Boston
— A warning … don’t do coke with either David Lee Roth or Karl Malden
— By majority decree, we determine Cora’s misdeeds were strictly limited to Houston
— We finish with some very pleasing topical ointment from Mick and the boys
On the “Who Will Come Out On Tops” CDST Show (Part 1):
— When it comes to winning hockey games, the Devils are definitely missing the details (particularly when it comes to holding leads in the 3rd period)
— And as for the cold Wings, that’s a similarly sad story; we’re a long way removed from the fat and happy years of the late 1990s/2000s
— the latest news about young gun Jack Hughes (you’re not in 17 & unders anymore)
— all about the belly flops of PK Subban
— We are at a complete loss to explain the new format for the utterly useless NBA All-star game, but in any event the changes won’t make it more watchable
— Hey Tom Brady bought a house in Tennessee … will he be traded for Tannehill?
— Various off the prop bets for the big game (we forgot one … will J. Lo reach a new low in the halftime extravaganza)
— Tank hits the road with his compass set on a laundromat
— Well-read tells us why not to go with Garoppolo
— Matriculating back in time to the last KC Super Bowl triumph … Stram hamstrings the Vikes with the immortal “65 toss power trap” (Len Dawson provides the commentary)
— Why most of us don’t go for Frisco (Keller is the lone hold out)
— Facebook groups are getting some serious play during halftime, and Brian’s the primary beneficiary
— Eric explains what Mr. Peanut and his no-so-imminent demise has to do with Kobe
— ChabDog tries in vain to interest our panel in the Aussie Open
— Why tennis isn’t always for wives and girlfriends
— Raquetball = enjoyable, poor man’s squash
— a tutorial on how cultivate the George Carlin look (that’s a whale of a pony tail)
— Who the heck is Bootle-judge and what is his decisionmaking authority
— Scott (Anthony?) Weiner … where is he now?
— Another public health emergency — Super Bowl Hangover
— The ecstasy and joy of a leap year
— David Ferrie emits plenty of ferriemones (solid gold from Oliver Stone) (“it’s a mystery, wrapped in a riddle, inside an enigma”)
On “The Show With No Name” CDST Show (Part 2):
— On a very sad, foggy day in LA, we close with “Raindrops keep falling on my head” and bid farewell to the immortal Black Mamba
— Walter Huston on why going for the gold can be hazardous to your health, particularly in the Sierra Madre (“I know what gold does to men’s souls” … “I think I’ll go to sleep and dream about piles of gold getting bigger and bigger and bigger”)
— It’s not exactly a replay of the 2002 National Championship Game, but we enjoy the latest iteration of MD-Indiana
— The Terps have size and speed, but do they have the balls to win on the road against good competition
— The discussion turns college admissions, and the travels of Well-read through the backwoods of the ACC
— Weeding out the truth underlying New Jersey’s reputation as the Garden State (You live in Jersey … what exit?)] — Deconstructing the Titanic collapse after being uncomfortably ahead last week in Arrowhead
— What if SF prevails? Sounds like a very hostile work environment in Beantown for TB 12.
— When it came to passes by Jimmy G. against the slacker Packers, 8 was enough.
— No Well-read, Travis Henry has retired.
— A prayer for good commercials … preferably ones of the stoner variety
— And now a Larry David break …never question the driving privileges of a guy in a wheelchair … texting while wheel turning is always permitted … suggested names for a boy adopted from China (“Wang isn’t a bad name … then you have the whole “ang” family … bang … tang … Chinese overtones with a little jolt to it”) (one of us says, “he reminds me of me”)
— Cheryl pronounces she’s leaving (“I’m leaving,… I can’t do this anymore … I just called you from an airplane .. the TIVO guy was here .. I saved all your shows … it’s not just about the TIVO … it’s about talking during sex … who can’t tell real crab from fake crab … I just realized, there’s no other side [to Larry]”)
— By the way, is there any point to having underwear without a fly zone? Is this really a worthless invention? We debate the question.
— A good woman who doesn’t hold it against you when she’s talking and you’re not all there is hard to find
— Tony enjoys some canoli’s for the beached whale
— What the heck is the “maloik”?
— “Hey Puss, did she even really exist?”
— “Not in the face, okay?” (this was a pointless request given where he ended up)
— Trying to understand why Pat Parisi was taking a leak in the boss’s pool
— Butch Cassidy’s short course on how to win a knife fight, without even using a knife (Lerch was really lurching forward after Newman’s surprise low blow)
— Speaking of Paul, hear his short course on how to bait a goalie in “Slapshot”
— My how the worm has turned in terms of the NBA’s association with China
— ChabDog previews what’s left of the Aussie Open, including Kyrgios vs. Nadal (bad blood running rampant), Monfils vs. Thiem (Thiem-work will prevail), Medvedev vs. Warwrinka and Rublev vs. Zverev (what’s with all the ‘evs)
— A crash course on how to pronounce Fucsovics
— Sandgren vs. Federer (look for a surprise)
— Raonic vs. Djokovic (go with flexiblity over pure power)
— What’s that African flag in the Women’s Draw (Well-read explains) (we pinpoint who the heavyweights are)
On the “Show With No Name” CDST Show (Part 1):
— Tank calls in with a major beef about his “Go-Dell” computer, which makes his magic ice scraper look like the bargain of the year/this man needs an IT trouble shooter, or perhaps a tech psychologist
— ‘Froing fresh light on Don Imis’ critique of RU Women’s Basketball
— Without any football to watch, it’s time to look in on the rodeo
— Everything you wanted to know but were afriad to ask about the White Man’s Burden
— Socialism = diet Communism?
— Mets hire Louie from Taxi as their new manager … or is it Rojas
— Eric’s advice … just scrub the hard drive (no big deal)
— GGGGGG Gone
— Analyzing the huge stamp on the back of a prominent male tennis player… what exactly did Fabio have in mind?
— Not fake news … the Saturday edition of Impeachment TV got lower ratings than the WNBA game of the week
— Name that Senator from the riveting Nixon hearings
— The latest new bumper sticker for Elizabeth Warren: Strawberry Fields Forever
— Hey Well-read … who’s Bootlejudge? Is he related to Beetlejuice?
— ChabDog tries to start a fire for moneyman Tommy Steyer
— Frankie Midnight tries ratcheting up interest in a late game run by Nurse Ratchet
— Frank bemoans the fact that revisionist history has been erased from his device’s memory
— Bringing our troubled co-host back to sanity with the ultra smooth tones of Andy Williams doing Burt Bacharach (the voice on loan from god) (“Walk on by”, the “Look of Love”, “Always Something There to Remind Me”)
— All about the latest cigar bar shooting (there was a pre-existing condition involved)
— The low down on why Maryland My Maryland cannot be trusted on the road against a quality (or near quality) team (we smell trouble for Turgeon’s turtles in Bloomerton)
— A play by play color commentary for Match Game … Among other questions that inquiring minds want to know: What is the deal with Rayburn’s obnoxiously long microphone? What was Charles Nelson Reilly’s claim to everlasting fame (give my regards to Broadway)? Has there ever been a better porn stache than Richard Dawson’s? Was that Kid Dynomite wearing a pork pie hat ala Mush Mouth and the Memphis Tams? What happened to fashion sense in the 70’s?
— Uncovering the truth about Cesar Romero … no joke about what the Joker was covering up
— What’s to like about the MD state flag on ChabDog’s Ravens jersey … it’s Steelers colors
— Our preview of the upcoming NBA Finals: Bucks vs. Clippers (that’s Armageddon)
— a contra virus update (time to batten down the hatches)
— Ode to the Williams sisters (Tank sings “Traces of Love” and bidding so long to the sad sacks)
— Sifting through the shrapnel kicked off by “Bombshell”
— Eric please explain how to nicely ask someone to hike their skirt up?
— Reaffirming our collective belief in the Chiefs
— Auditioning for the Regan voiceover in “The Exorcist 3”
On the Mid-January Affect CDST Show (Part 2):
— Best of the Western trailers is on display as we showcase “The Great Northfield Minnesota Raid” (Cliff Robertson as Cole Younger, with his curious bullet proof vest and Robert Duvall as Jesse James, escaping from the scene of the crime dressed in old lady’s garb), “The Long Riders” (Keach, Carradine, Quaid and Guest brothers) and “The Wild Bunch” (William Holden’s performance as Pike will make you hold your breach, Robert Ryan is the ever captivating lawman on his trail, Warren Oats gets drunk and gets married and Borgnine is, well, Borgnine) …
— We can’t see our way from staying away from Tennessee … looks like our glasses were fogged up (and Andy was doing more on the sidelines than ordering up from the Denny’s menu)
— Eric’s attempt to lecture on the colonization of Australia … despite never having made the trip (boy was my ass sore after going there)
— ChabDog does a mini-handicap of the Aussie Open Men’s field, but is handicapped without his top 32 list (we need more than the picture of Berdych and Queen Ester)
— White men can’t jump … and neither can John Isner, but on his smash down serve, it doesn’t matter.
— Santa is beard boy? And then she saw Jimmy Connors … how exciting … except that it did conjure up images of Cousin Eddie from Vegas Vacation
— Watching pre-game for Chiefs-Titans and admiring all the sharp dressed men
— Nailing the trivial question about non-participants in the NFC Championship game since 1991 (Tank gets it faster than he can eat blueberry pancakes)
— Time to put an APB out for Massachusetts Maaahk? He needs to show up for his job interview in Vegas, where he’ll be lifting as a bouncer and Ubering/Lyfting as a driver.
— No Andy Reid isn’t losing weight; he’s just dressed in black.
— Troy P. is definitely head and shoulders ahead of his competition for the Hall.
— An extended discussion of Plunkett vs. Eli for enshrinement at Canton. Going back in time to remember the Just Win Baby Raiders of the mid-70s to mid-80’s (The Tuz = O.W. Matthews from North Dallas Forty/Lester the Molester/Snake/Mark Moving Van Eeghen/Cliff “Speed Kills” Branch/Jack Tatum/Mann and Guy as kicker and punter)/Todd “Renaissance Man” Christensen
— Frank joins the fray and makes impassioned bids for voting in Coach Flores and Drew Pearson
— And would somebody please explain how Gastineau did not get in … let alone Klecko
— Diagramming an Italian Dog (pizza bread, potatoes and doggies, with very optional ketchup) (got to eat them in New York, because that’s where they have the good water)
— All about the infamous no-show watcher for the Bloomfield Ave. water tower in Newark, and how to get a park named after you by doing but living offa the graft
— What’s up with RU b-ball; Scarlet Knights are finally up for the fight, maybe for the first time since ’76
— Big doings in the Big 10
— Don’t even try to give the host grief for the Bruins being in ruins
— Some unforgettable clips with The Gipper
— Saturday Night’s All Right For Fighting … and so is Sunday morning
On the “Mid-January Affect” CDST Show (Part 1):
— Don’t forget to access our show on i-heart radio, i-tunes, and elsewhere on the world wide web
— Raw doggin it at Dicky D’s (Italian dogs are on the menu today for Tank, who’s firing on all cylinders by going with the Niners and Chiefs)
— We announce that “The Mets’ season has been officially ruined” … thank you very little little smug Alex for dropping that dime on Beltran and giving the Wilponizi’s no choice but to show him the door
— But let’s get some clarity … are we penalizing the Houston players (or ex-players) or not?
— It’s pretty darn clear everyone on the Stros was listening for trash cans and getting buzzed for good measure
— Eric will only be placated by the Stros and Bosox recent titles being vacated
— Explaining the hidden story behind the 1951 Shot Heard Round the World (binoculars and flashlights were getting lots of use)
— Nobody stole bean ball Bob Gibson’s signs
— Time for MLB to take inventory on those pesky Apple watches
— New replacements for I like getting licked Mickey — Edgardo “Winning is so bourgeois” Perez or some guy from the minors who is 500 games below .500
— It’s all Trump’s (no Marc’s) fault.
— It’s time for Frank to fly and feed on his furters, but that Keller feller most capably fills the void
— Will the Astros be forced to foot Hugh Darvish’s therapy bill? It’s certainly a whopper.
— When it came to keeping things close with Frisco, most of us thought Green Bay would find a way … and boy were we wrong
— For a guy that’s a powerful, punishing runner, upright, chiseled Henry has more than a little Walker in him
— Ryan Tannehill=a poor man’s Trent Dilfer
— Gonna give Well-read flack for slipping Flacco into the NFC Championship convo .. (missing a few vowels lol)
— More on the short half-back life of running QBs
— Another recounting of the last moments of TB 12’s failed 2019 campaign (“Well…. bye … you smell that Bill? Smells like someone died”)
— The NBA’s China Syndrome code of silence … a sad state of affairs
— Getting a little vocal about the job done by Vogel
— No the Clippers cannot play the Lake Show in the Finals
— Mike Tyson type short work by 170 pound McGregor (scary good going 0 to 40)
— A personal prayer from ChabDog to view 50 year old footage of Nancy Kwan in the square circle with the late great Sharon Tate
— Finding out why Cora needed to “clean his details” (how you like them apples?)
— Do you like women? A real loaded question … particularly for a 7-yr old. I dream of Jeannie, and Tsa Tsa (“Olivah? Olivah?)
— Yours truly was rock solid in the Sports Rock regular season pool, but the post season was certainly not kind
— David Bugg … a super nice guy even for a Boys fan … and he’s certainly a stone cold killer when it comes to sizing things up in the playoffs
And these Titans don’t seem to fear anyone … not the Patriots, not Lamar Jackson, and certainly not the #2 seed with all the speed. If they figure out a way to limit Kelce, control the run and force Mahomes to go outside to the wide outs, along with riding the wide thighs of Hammer Henry, why can’t they get it done. This game seems closer than the spread indicates, and watch out if Tennessee has the lead in the 4th. When it comes to extended periods of suffering, the visitors have just as much to complain about (20 years since they fell one measly yard short). And Vrabel may have learned a thing or do from Belichick about how to read Reid.
On the “Divvying Up The Divisional Spoils” CDST Show (Part 2):
— Getting comfortable with some Southern Comfort (powerful good stuff from Powers Booth) (“I’m telling you Harden … relax”)
— Melissa McCarthy comes to a full stop in the middle of a highway, leading to a big confrontation between Sandy Bigelows
(it’s a family name … goes back to the Mayflower … ever heard of Jeremiah Bigelow, the bear hunter)
— What it means for a kid to look like Tom Petty in a negative way (“You look like a @#$# bank commercial couple”)
— How to survive hour two without a football game to watch and no Maahk (well, Purdue is playing Mich St. in b-ball)
— Well-read explains the real meaning of a Boilermaker (and we’re not talking about the drink)
— ChabDog waxes adnauseam about the virtues of the Aussie Open (and in this year’s heat, expect to see some foreign legion hats ala Lendl)
— Previewing the BSC Championship … we raise the specter of Burrow beating back some adversity
— A free therapy session for weaning ourselves off of the gridiron girdle.
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