Because sports should never run your life ... retorts for sports

Category Archives: MLB

On the February 26 edition of ChabDog Sports Talk (pt. 2):


On the Sunday, February 26 edition of ChabDog Sports Talk (pt. 2):
— Marc admits to everyone that he’s an obsessed Frankophile;
— Question for the panel: Will Boston be the next City of Champions?;
— Lots of background noise from the Patriot peanut gallery;
— Frank holds Marc in contempt … of court and with regard to literally everything else, including the cantankerous cabbie’s dismissal of the Mets, who he insists will be quite alright (except for their useless athletic trainer);
— After a few pregnant pauses, we consider a halfway house solution, involving 45 minute splits for our feuding guests;
— There’s no substitute for the Red Sox outfield;
— Accounting for Dan Marino’s exodus from major TV broadcasts … clearing the air after Savattere;
— Why Deion don’t do stretching … he’s like a Cheetah, who doesn’t need to…
— Celebrating Steely Dan and the 1979 Super Bowl Champion Steelers (we’ve got rowdy Curt Gowdy clips);
— We recall the 1986 Super Bowl debacle for New England, but do give mention to their squishing of the fish in the AFC Championship;
— Marc tells us what the NHL and women share;
— 1-800-cars for kids wins as the most annoying, can’t get it outta my brain sports talk radio commercial, beating out Optima Tax Relief;
— Expert tips on how to defend, not just tend, a bar;
— The best part of hockey — dropping the gloves;
— Bruin darlings Terry O’Reilly and Cam Neely;
— Brodeur vs. Roy bragging rights;
— What it takes to be a really good sport … just ask the queen in History of the World Pt. 1’s outdoor chess scene;
— getting afflicted with more Pedroia paranoia;
and more

- Give a dog a bone and rate this post

On the February 19 edition of ChabDog Sports Talk (pt. 2):

–Marc admits he reads Frank’s rag, and then we draw attention (for whatever reason) to Anna Benson;
— More intense wrangling between The Clerk vs The Boston Piece of Work;
— Attend a very exclusive party with the Three Stooges;
— Celtic ringleaders are exposed;
— Analyzing the degree of difficulty in the various NE Super Bowl wins;
— the merits of Dandy Dan Marino are subject to intense scrutiny;
— hear why the Gonzaga saga isn’t continuing past 2-3 rounds in NCAA;
–great weather back East for throwing snowballs at the joggers;
— hear a classic rant from the red scourge of Bloomington –“You will not @#$@# put me in that position again!” and hear about why he got fired from Indy (“Hey, Knight”);
— We remember fondly Ivan Kovalev and George The Animal Steele;
— Marc’s pleased as punch to now be riding in the front seat of a Crown Vic;
— Frank brings us back to the last time his life was in imminent danger; and
— the subject of lesbian conversion is raised by our esteemed panel, and transitory memories from the Hangover 1 and 2.

- Give a dog a bone and rate this post

On the Sunday, December 11, 2016 ChabDog Sports Talk Show:



5-24-16 bran-eric at Orlandos

1-22-16 caruso

12-12-16-byner 12-12-16-chris-sale

12-12-16-fran 12-12-16-frank-in-court

12-12-16-gilbert 12-12-16-sipe 12-12-16-toilet-bowl

  • Tune in as Eric the Well-read takes us around the broad shoulders of the NFL
  • Frank Fleming overcomes the agony of dee feet to break down Army’s victory over Navy, and takes us back through the very substantial glory days of the Cleveland Browns (from Graham to Brown to Sipe/Byner to the counterfeit Browns that survived Modell’s move)
  • Meet Black Knight receiver Edgar Allen Poe; — Images of Gilbert Gottfried and Fran Drescher doing Romeo and Juliet; — RG 3 (and not his girlfriend) evokes premature ejaculations of elation about a possible Brown victory in the Toilet Bowl/Battle of Ohio
  • Why players give up guaranteed money not to play in Cleveland (20 different QBs since 1999, hiring Podesta the “Baseball Guy” to run football operations, career wins leader among QBs in FirstEnergy Stadium (in 17 years) is an opposing team player named Big Ben)
  • Debunking the myth that Pittsburgh will have trouble with the Bills
  • Figuring out where Wentz’s “A” game went
  • Assessing the slim playoff hopes of the Phins, and why, in any event, their playoff lives would be hopelessly Hobbesian — nasty, brutish and short
  • Marc touts Frank as Trump’s new Ambassador to New Jersey
  • Mad Dog Maddon is in and Mad Dog Russo is clearly out
  • Caruso sings excessively prophetic as he calls the Giants over Cowboys (Odella is fast as hella!), Skins over Philly, Tennessee over Denver, Cincy over Cleveland, but we all miss Texans vs. Colts
  • Explaining how the Puppet master does plug ‘n play
  • Did next year’s 2017 AL Pennant just get purchased by the Red Sox for a Sale price?
  • Frank and Marc express their mutual amazement and abhorrence at being forced to live so “Coast” together
  • and more!
- Give a dog a bone and rate this post

On the Sunday, November 13 ChabDog Sports Talk show:

11-17-16-ax 11-17-16-borden

11-17-16-john-henry 11-17-16-mr-stay-puft

11-17-16-nj-generals 11-17-16-the-tuz

4-21-15 chabdog10-23-15 eric sauve

9-24-15 Frank1-22-16 caruso


On the Sunday, November 13 ChabDog Sports Talk show:
— Don’t miss the genius of Eric the Well-read’s latest, perfect promo, with choice clips from No Country For Old Men, Blazing Saddles, It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World, Ghostbusters, North Dallas Forty … and the 2016 Presidential campaign;
— Pop pops off, while Ventriloquist Bill gives us a surprising mouthful in terms of espousing his friendship and loyalty for the odd couple — Donald and Kerry;
— Speculate on the reasons for Nick Satan’s failure to vote;
— Stan Ber, our resident John Henry, takes time out from his sojourns down south to assure us that the boring, predictable Ravens are still going nowhere, despite their take down of the Steelers, and a few days earlier, “Cleveland just ran out of poop”;
— We salivate about the prospects for the Big 10 Stupor Bowl (Illinois vs. Maryland) and the meeting of the super misfits (Rutgers vs. Kansas);
— And what about the Terps’ latest display of Under Armour armor: the hot red Blinky look (hides the bruises and the blood);
— Punting as a lethal weapon at Iowa City (just ask Jimbo);
— Connor from Pitt graduates the week with high honors, and to the horror of Clemson, kicker Blewitt doesn’t blow it;
— Frank celebrates his 42nd with a Dolphin win and a punishing loss for the Patriots, and tells us about the New Jersey Generals pennant hanging in his apartment;
— We all get blindsided by Seattle’s Sunday night special … the biggest unsolved murder mystery in New England since “Lizzie Borden grabbed the ax, gave her father 40 whacks, and when she saw what she had done, she gave her mother 41.”
— Nobody is seduced by J-ville at home;
— Tony Puppa, the mush, was right about KC winning at Carolina (sorry Mark)
— Rams win in a snoozer and without 2 TD (so unfortunately no free burger at Jack-in-the-Box;
— Some of us (but not all) correctly predict the Dirty Birdy losing in Philthydelphia;
— Redskins dump a hailstorm on the Purple People Eaters with the mascot wearing the funny hat;
— Aaron Rodgers amazes us by playing more and more like Fred Rogers;
— and more ….


- Give a dog a bone and rate this post

On the November 6 edition of ChabDog Sports Talk, we were preoccupied with…

11-9-16-bowling-ball 11-9-16-lebron


11-9-16-wendy-williams5-7-16 chabdog-sauve

1-22-16 caruso9-24-15 Frank

On the Sunday, November 6 edition of ChabDog Sports Talk, we were preoccupied with:
— Frank Fleming’s conspiracy theory on why PC didn’t want Marshawn of few words to be the 2015 Super Bowl MVP;
— Memories of Ricky Rasta Man Williams (sorry to remind you, Mike Ditka, about shooting your wad);
— Eric the Well-read buffs his bowling ball while listening to Verne “Puffy” Lundquist do the Bama-LSU defensive death spiral;
— We speculate that Rutgers has the last game of the year against Maryland marked with a scarlet circle;
— The latest on the Jersey bridge fiasco — using traffic as a political football —
— Buckeyes give the Huskers a black eye and a much needed boot out of the top 10;
— Wild success across the board in Washington is setting up quite a juicy Apple Cup;
— USC possibly seeing its way to a shot at the Rose Bowl at this rate;
— Mora misery for UCLA and more shame for Notre Dame;
— The Big 12 as a faker’s dozen of mediocrity;
— Huskies may be banished from the BSC due to their scheduling of the out-of-conference Scarlet Letter Knights;
— Remembering how the drought finally ended for the Windy City Cubbies, marked by a bit of rain hitting Progressive Field just before the fateful 2-run top of the tenth;
— How the Cubs actually won with a pitcher who could not throw over to first?
— The top ten reasons Joe Buck sucks as a baseball announcer;
— Making sense of the NFL penal code (cell phone destruction vs. domestic violence) — the wheel of misfortune;
— Caruso speculates that Cleveland Steamers left on the puppet master’s desk are definitely grounds for being traded … just ask Jamie Collins, and then questions whether Big Ben is the toughest QB in the league when it comes to getting him to leave the women’s bathroom;
— Who was the inept softball woman commentating on FOX this year for baseball? Inquiring minds want to know.
— Maryland getting raped in the Big House by Michigan…. the horror!;
— Decoding Jay Ajayi;
— Some classic Jim Rome (Bohica);
— Revisiting our hard-on for LeBron (may he fall out of the Indians’ luxury box);
— ChabDog and Mark put their faith in the Raiders and it is well placed (sorry Frank);
— Scoffing at Jared Goff and windbag Wendy Williams;
— Cutting it up at the Barber Shop with “I saw her standing there;
— Our team settles on a number of very seductive NFL predictions, including ChabDog picking the Lions, Panthers over the Rams, Giants over the Eagles, Jets to crash and burn, Saints to fine the Niners, and Dallas Dallas Dallas.

- Give a dog a bone and rate this post

On the Sunday, October 30 edition of ChabDog Sports Talk…

11-2-16-big-red-w 11-2-16-herm 11-2-16-j-cagney



On the Sunday, 10-30 ChabDog Sports Talk Show, topics include:
— Frank sings a tribute to Andy Dandy Dalton;
— We discuss why the Bengals are turning into the Raiders, how the Raiders are turning into the Patriots, and why the future is quite tenuous for Marvin Lewis.
— A blow by blow account of another stinker of a game in jolly old England, including the shocking miss by hop scotch Hopkins.
— Speculation about the location for the next overseas NFL Game (Zaire, Bahrain, Iran?).
— Nebraska exposed in loss to the Big Red Ws.
— Clemson wins another clumsy scoring affair, but who cares… they’ll never beat Bama
— Frank reminds ChabDog why AJ Green is no AC Green — he knows how to score sometimes
— The NBA Hall of Fame’s open door policy…
— We overcome massive static from Mars (or was it really Well-read’s line).
— Eric touts the new alternative to Clinton/Kane and Trump/Pence …. it’s the Weiner/Holder ticket
— Explaining the Huma/Anthony connection by looking at a past episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm (Larry David and the Palestinian woman)
— We shame the Cubs into fighting back by playing clips from the Bad News Bears, put them through some extensive psychoanalysis, and give them a kick in the ass with the John Belushi inspirational speech, “Whatever happened when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor…”.
— Why Joe Buck is not even a counterfeit Ernie Johnson, or worse, an actual baseball announcer/
— Massachusetts Mark Caruso returns to play more Patriots’ games with Frank’s head.
— We recount the best baseball celebration of all time … when Neon Deion poured champagne on McCarver.
— Words of wisdom from the incomparable Frank Caliendo (doing Charles Barkley, Steven A, Jim Rome, Adam Schechter, Jon Gruden, Herm Edwards and Bill Walton).
— Mark reminds us that Dan Marino can’t even hold Tom Brady’s jock strap.
— Who is this guy Jay Ajayi?
— A classic spat from Ted 2.
— We correctly call the NE knockout of Dumb and Dumber, Atlanta having its way with Green Bay, and ChabDog goes out on a limb by booking the Jets over the reprieve-less Cleveland.


- Give a dog a bone and rate this post

MLB Playoffs Update, Recap and Perspectives: Wednesday, 11-2



MLB Playoffs Update (World Series):

  • Congrats to the gutsy 2016 Cubs, who had the balls to fight back when everything looked hopeless, and proved once again that curses are made to be broken. Time to put the goat on the barbie forever! The best team won tonight, and the drought to end all droughts fittingly ends after the rain delay. #Cubs #Indians
- Give a dog a bone and rate this post

Categories: MLB

MLB Playoffs Update, Recap and Perspectives: Saturday, 10-29


MLB Playoffs Update (World Series)

  • No more mulligans for the sheepish Cubs, after Kluber lays down the hammer for six, and Kipnis tips the scales conclusively with a huge 3-run bomb in the top of the 7th. Don’t count on Francona letting Maddon know what the secret is to coming back from the dead. #Cubs #Indians
- Give a dog a bone and rate this post

Categories: MLB

Law Office of Brandon S. Chabner

A Professional Corporation — providing business and outside general counsel services, including entity formation, contract drafting and negotiation and transaction structuring.

for more information, go to and mention promo code “CHABDOG” for a 20% discount on our regular hourly rate.


- Give a dog a bone and rate this post

Original Rinaldi’s

- Give a dog a bone and rate this post

- Give a dog a bone and rate this post